A female friend of mine, fresh on the dating scene after a disengaged marriage, lamented the lack of an available good man.  She is offended by many of the online dating sites where available men list as a requirement a “clean woman” — which, I was told, is a code phrase that translates into a “woman who washes her private parts on a regular basis.”


The fact that so many men think women need reminding to “wash down there” in order to be dating material is more than off-putting for my friend because it shows just how immature and out-of-touch those men are when it comes to having a relationship with a real woman.

As I pondered the idea of requiring a “Clean Woman” — I was led to think about another turn-of-word I’ve seen advertised on Facebook and MySpace:  Men looking for a “Christian Girl.”

Is the phrase “Christian Girl” socially accepted coded language that means a “submissive and catering” female who knows her second place in the home and accepts the man as the head of household and decider of all things monetary and emotional?

Is the term “Christian Girl” a bit of a cudgel using the Bible to enforce morality and reform the values of any wild notion that a woman belongs only to herself — and not solely to her husband or to his oppressive God?

4 Comments

  1. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
    Gordon Davidescu says:

    One of the first things I did after reading this was to google “Christian Girl” and the results were hilarious or sad depending on how you look at it. One of the top links is “How to attract a Christian Girl” and it made me think you are spot on with your definition.
    I can’t believe that there are so many ignorant people out there in regards to cleanliness and assumptions they make. Sad.

  2. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
    David W. Boles says:

    Gordon —
    These code phrases are socially acceptable ways to discriminate against the “unclean” and the “non-submissives” by appearing to invoke greater conscience or power into the relationship dyad.
    It is certainly sad that these efforts are so transparent and non-malleable and one wonders just what sort of make his “hooked” with these public requirements.

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