Cyber Monday Meltdown

We all know and loathe “Black Friday” — but I didn’t realize “Cyber Monday” was the first Monday after Black Friday and it is my fault that I wasn’t paying attention the calendar as I wasted an entire day yesterday rassling with Amazon and UPS over missing orders and late deliveries.

Yesterday — Cyber Monday Meltdown Day — started off wrong early on as an emergency overnight UPS delivery didn’t arrive by 10:30am.

I called UPS around 1:48pm to try to divine from UPS when my urgent delivery would arrive.  I was told by young “Mike” that UPS were overwhelmed and that I would get my package sometime that day but he had no idea when.

I asked Mike to call my local dispatch office to have them page my driver to get me a solid delivery time — that’s standard procedure for this sort of missed delivery.  He refused. 

I was surprised by his refusal and I told Mike I paid $85 for morning delivery and the box was over three hours late.

Mike did not care about my box.  He wanted my sympathy for them being overwhelmed with deliveries.

Normally, I would’ve pressed him a bit more on his illogical argument, but I decided to hang up after he disconnected me while I waited to be connected to a supervisor.

I didn’t call back UPS right away because I was preoccupied with a strange Amazon order transgression.  I order my life through Amazon and they are always quick and efficient in satisfying my wants and needs.

On Monday, I placed an order that had been broken up into three deliveries.  One of those three deliveries was not showing as shipped.  I called Amazon to find out why because that was abnormal and strange.

I was connected to a foreign service center where the people did not understand English.  They tried to tell me the product was sold out and that I would have it in three to five days.  I explained to them that I knew the product was in stock when I ordered it and the fact that it was bundled with another product — and not alone — meant that the product was, indeed, in stock.  Out of stock orders always ship alone.

“No it isn’t” was the Amazon response.

I called Amazon a second time and decided to take another approach.  I asked for the Tracking Number for the missing package.  They also did not speak English well and they were confused by my question.

I found the USA help number for Amazon and I called.  I explained my previous frustration with Amazon foreign support and “Michelle” was just as confused as I was when she checked my order.  She said my credit card was charged for that third shipment but she didn’t understand why the package wasn’t appearing as “shipped.”  She said she’d keep an eye on it all day and email me later when she found out something new.

It was now 3pm and I still did not have my emergency UPS overnight delivery.  I also saw on the UPS site that Amazon package number one was “out for delivery” but that, strangely, Amazon package number two was re-scheduled for the next day — today — and not yesterday.  There were no exceptions.  No weather delays.  No mechanical trouble.  The package arrived at the local UPS station at 11 am instead of 4 am — but that always meant in the past that a UPS scout truck would be sent out to make the delivery later in the day.

I called UPS again and was connected to an old pro who had been working there for 19 years.  He apologized for “Mike.”  He told me when I get someone like Mike to just hang up and call back.  The old pro had no idea why I didn’t get my emergency box.  He offered to send an urgent message to my local duty supervisor and he promised I would have a call back in an hour with a delivery time for my box.

I then asked him about Amazon package two that was strangely rescheduled for delivery the next day.  He, too, was confused by what he saw in the package history.  There were no exceptions.  No delivery delays — except that the plane was late — but that “happens all the time” he said.  He sent a second inquiry to my local UPS duty supervisor.

Ten minutes later, my local UPS duty supervisor called and told me I’d have my emergency box in 20 minutes.  I asked her about the Amazon package reschedule and she couldn’t help me.  She said she only knows what’s on a truck by the tracking number and she doesn’t have that information for the scout trucks.

15 minutes later, my doorbell rang.  A harried UPS driver delivered my overnight emergency box along with Amazon package number one — and also package number three that Amazon said had “not shipped” and was “out of stock” even though my “credit card had been charged!”

Four hours later, in the nigh dead-of-night, my doorbell rang again — and the same harried UPS driver delivered Amazon package number two that was rescheduled for today even though it was supposed to be delivered yesterday… and it was!

I have learned my lesson:  Buy nothing online between Thanksgiving and January 1st — unless, of course, you want to spend your days on the phone with UPS and Amazon and your nights awake answering the bleating ring of the harried UPS delivery man.