I don’t know if the rise in a bad economy is responsible for a similar rise in Bad Voice Mail Performance — but there has to be a correlation somewhere! 


When you leave a Voice Mail message, be brief.  Get to the point.  Do not just say “call me” and hang up.  Provide information and the action you need me to take, if any.

When you create a Voice Mail greeting, be brief.  Just saying your name is enough.  Don’t make us sit through your script as a captive caller.  Set us free to speak as soon as possible.

For some reason lately, silliness reigns in the Voice Mail people leave and in the Voice Mail Greetings they create.

Sometimes skits are performed in silly voices.

Sometimes only guttural sounds are uttered.

One time I thought I heard music playing as the accompaniment to the sung message!

Have you ever been the victim of a Bad Voice Mail Message/Greeting Performance?  If not, I’ll warn you now they are almost as annoying as the phantom phones ringing in radio commercials!

If you have had to set through a bad recorded performance, what methods did the culprit use that made you want to smash your phone handset into the fourth wall?

4 Comments

  1. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
    Gordon Davidescu says:

    When I know that someone is serious about their messages, I only leave serious messages.
    For my dear friends who know and expect my insanity, I sing my messages. Mind you, I don’t sing a song to them. I sing the words to my message.
    No offers for off-off-off Broadway musicals yet 🙂

  2. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
    David W. Boles says:

    Nooooooooooooooo! (Running from the room screaming…)

  3. Kathakali Chatterjee – Hyderabad, India – Professionally, I have an interesting concoction of experience -- from entertainment industry to retailing to executive education -- the journey is still on. When I don't work, I love to travel, read, listen to music and watch movies.
    kathakali.chatterjee says:

    “Hi, this is Katha…I am unable to take your call now — please leave your name and number — I will get back to you as soon as I can, thanks!”
    This is when I am in a civilized mode.
    “Hey, you know what…I don’t feel like talking now….will get back to you later if I like your voice enough….”
    It goes without saying – this message is definitely not there in my official phone and those who reach me in this number are equally insane…

  4. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
    David W. Boles says:

    It is strange how so many people find a delight in dealing with a machine that records their voice. It makes you wonder what they’re like in a real life conversation.

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