Becky was watching the debut of the Yankees against Tampa Bay this afternoon when she decided to figure out what she wanted to watch after the baseball game.

Her eye landed on QVC and she couldn’t believe what she was seeing from 8-10pm tonight in the program description:

New, HD, Jewelry, tableware and fragrances inspired by artifacts from the Titanic. (Shopping, 60 Mins.).

Oh, how Becky could not wait for 8pm to chime in on her iPhone!

Becky imagined all the neat “inspired artifacts” she might buy tonight.

She was definitely going to get the “Decomposing Body Wash.”

“Anchor Earrings” were also on her short list as were the “Iceberg Lettuce Tongs” for her dinner table.

She also needed to buy a gross of “S.O.S. Soap Pads” that would help her scrape off the gunk and rust from the Bergen-Belsen pots and pans set she bought last year from the Home Shopping Network.

Oh, and she secretly hoped for a modern twist on the Titanic story: The “3D Replica Re-Release of James Cameron’s Crusty Underwear” — just like the kind he soiled when he was dropped into the Mariana Trench last week.

“Oh, Gosh,” Becky thought to herself, “Buying Titanic-inspired artifacts from QVC might be seen as being in bad taste, so I better buy the ‘Decomposing Carcass Breath Mints’ just to cover the cure.”

8 Comments

    1. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
      David W. Boles says:

      I couldn’t believe the listing when I first saw it on TV. It’s just so crass and inhumanly petty.

    1. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
      David W. Boles says:

      Absolutely right, Gordon. Tragedy becomes entertainment for profit.

        1. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
          David W. Boles says:

          Yes. The monetization of grieving is a big, sick, business!

  3. ANNE – I live and teach on the upper West Coast of the United States. My interests are Philosophy, English, and Social Communication.
    ANNE says:

    It is a disturbing story, David. I am glad you opened up comments again. I can’t ever remember my password.

    1. David Boles – New York City – David Boles was born in Nebraska and holds an MFA from the Oscar Hammerstein II Center for Theatre Studies at Columbia University in the City of New York. He is an author, dramatist, editor, publisher, and teacher who writes across the live stage, print, radio, television, film, and the web. With more than 50 books in print, David continues to write 2MM words a year and has authored over 25K articles. He is a member of the Dramatists Guild, the Authors Guild, and PEN America, and founded The United Stage advocacy platform on the principle that playwrights have a duty to direct their own work. Read the Prairie Voice Archive at Boles.com | Buy his books at David Boles Books Writing & Publishing at BolesBooks.com | Study with Script Professor at ScriptProfessor.com | Touch American Sign Language mastery at Hardcore ASL at HardcoreASL.com | Explore the Human Meme podcast at HumanMeme.com | Train with Boles Bells at BolesBells.com.
      David W. Boles says:

      I appreciate your thoughts, Anne.

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