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Coke Blak is a Polyester Sweater

We usually talk about big ideas here — and we’ll get back to that tomorrow with some Big News and other vital matters pressing the urban core, and if you are in search of some deeper reading right now, click here — but today we’re going to take a pause that does not refresh as we virtually taste test and review together a new pox upon humankind:

  


When I first learned about Coke Blak I was deeply intrigued. “What
could be better,” I unwittingly wondered, “than the mixture of two of
my favorite beverages — black coffee and soda pop?”

Beware of what you wish for because you might just have to swallow an 8
oz. bottle of it in a gooey, unsmooth and sickly-tasting dose of
medicine pretending to be a refreshing drink.

Coke Blak tastes like those coffee toffee candies really old people
would give you on Halloween when you were a young kid roaming the wild
city streets.

Coke Blak leaves you with an aftertaste that never goes away.

Coke Blak sticks to your teeth like a polyester sweater your
grandmother knitted and wants you to wear without an undershirt on a
sweltering day to prove your appreciation.

Coke Blak can make young women swoon, old men cry and teenagers afraid
of the dark.

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