Urban Dictionary Swears to Tell the Truth, the Whole Truth and Nothing but… BwaHaHah!

If we need more evidence the world is imploding on its own good misdeeds, we need look no further than the weight of the ridiculousness that the Urban Dictionary is now being used in courts of law to define colloquial phrases and to help educate judges and juries as to “meaning in the street.”

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Spam Crusader Dan Balsam

I’ve been getting spam for many years — as long as there has been easily accessible e-mail, there has been spam. What could be easier than writing up an e-mail, addressing it to hundreds of thousands of people, and hitting send? As e-mail programs and services get more clever and find ways to filter out junk e-mail, people become ever more crafty with how they write their spam so that the filters don’t trap it.

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Concealing the Prison Tat

If you have a tattoo placed on your own skin by your own free will — and if you are going to court — should the State be required to pay a cosmetologist to cover your ink so you’ll get a fair trial?  Can a tattoo ever be unfairly prejudicial?

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Lindsay Lohan Tells Us to F-Off!

When Lindsay Lohan appeared in open court this week with “F*ck U” written on the middle fingernail facing the judge sentencing her, we all heaved a sign of remorse that the young woman will never understand how to properly live by the common rules of society, or respect the mores and laws constructed to collectively protect us from the aberrant individual other like her.

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Defending the Douchebags

We fully support the douchebags!  You can’t insult people online and
expect to escape unpunished.  A “douchebag” — is never a compliment —
for it is the empty container of fluid used to flush clean a woman’s
vagina.  There’s no mistaking the insult of being a limp, used up,
‘gina bag.

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Stick a Pin in Sarkozy: He is Done

What we bind together and choose to fight defines our cultural values and our inherent morality and immoral choices.  When a French court ruled that voodoo dolls of French President Nicolas Sarkozy must be sold with a warning label indicating sticking pins in the toy hurts Sarkozy’s feelings, a small slice of intellectual freedom was preserved in the presumptive ridiculousness of the ruling:

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The Architecture of Belonging: Resurrecting Habeas Corpus

In a historic — and Bush-shattering 5-4 vote — the Supreme Court of the United States of America invoked its inherent authority to decide the law of the land.

Continue reading → The Architecture of Belonging: Resurrecting Habeas Corpus