Wilma’s Boy

My mother, Wilma Jean Boles, died on June 24, 2024. She was 85-years-old. Her death was unfortunate, and unnecessarily gruesome in that, in the end, she chose not to walk, or eat, or take her medication after a major surgery; the only thing she desired was a quick death. My mother always fought for what she wanted, and sometimes what she wanted is what nobody else wanted, including her death. Wilma never really recovered from elective surgery she had on May 23, 2024 to fix a perforated diaphragm where half of her stomach and part of her colon were stuck in her chest cavity, placing pressure on her left lung. Her surgeon believed she’d been living with that condition for more than 25 years; and he also believed there was “no good reason” for her not to recover and get better. As I have worked to come to terms with Wilma’s death, and the first 23 years of our life together, I am surrounded by — and often hunted with — the memories of my mother’s life, her successes, her disappointments, and her ability to continually confound the unwary. I have also realized, but not quite yet accepted, that no matter how hard I try, or how fast I may run, I will always be “Wilma’s Boy.”

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Why We Own the Misery of Erin Moran

The untimely death of child actress Erin Moran over the weekend — at age 56, her body was discovered in an Indiana trailer park — leaves an abyss in each of us even though we may not recognize the depth, and the severity, of the hole. For those of us of a certain age, Erin Moran, will always be Joanie — the spunky, spicy, daughter on the first season of Happy Days.

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50 Years of Regret

My article on Seven Depressions yesterday brought an old friend back in touch who shared with me that he has been suffering from depression most of his adult life.  He appreciated the bluntness of the post that depressed people are sort of stuck in their lives traveling from one medication to another looking for the right mix of meds to help them build a bridge to start feeling average again.  Some never feel better.  Nobody finds a cure.

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Seven Depressions

We know most of my friends are still medicated and, the other day, I was concerned when I read an article claiming that most depressive people on daily maintenance medication will have seven major episodes over the arc of their lives.  The demarcation between depressive events was notched as major changes in medication.  Some of my young friends have had only a couple of events.  Some of my older friends are deeper into their modes of seven.

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Could You Come Up with a Thousand Dollars in Cash Today?

I was talking to a financial planner friend of mine the other day, and one of the standardized questions he asks clients and potential clients is if they had to, could they come up with a thousand dollars in one day for an emergency?

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How Sugar Creates Depression

On April 29, 2011, I wrote an article for the Boles University BlogBipolarism and Sugar  Consumption — where I argued depressed people were self-medicating with refined sugar to create a false high that then quickly resulted in an even deeper, depressive, low:

Bipolarism is defined by manic highs and severe lows and medication can help keep that under control, but there is the silent danger of the over consumption of sugar to help retain those dramatic highs and valley lows — but few patients and doctors are prescient enough to also prescribe a “no sugar” diet to Bipolar patients in addition to medication.

If you suffer from Bipolarism, and if you crave sugar to unwittingly help replicate the emotional highs and lows of your disease — try carving sugar out of your diet, and that includes alcohol, too — and see if you don’t immediately start feeling warm and neutral and safe again.

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Bipolarism and Sugar Consumption

We all know sugar is terrible for us — sugar is The New White Devil — and yet we can’t seem to escape its granular grasp.  We live in a sugary circle of feeling low, boosting our blood sugar with sugar and then crashing again.  How can we escape this treacherous roundabout?

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Mall Depression

I love shopping online.  I can take my time.  I can easily compare styles and prices.  I don’t have to stand in line or fight any crowds.  The other day, I visited a prominent and stylishly fashionable mall I hadn’t been in for over five years, and the changes were astonishing.

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Victory and Vanquishing Creates Societal Bipolarism

When did the USA become purely a culture of winning and losing?  Once, we were a nation of sacred human beings — and now we are merely the personification of the victor and the vanquished:  Winners and Losers.

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Do Low Serotonin Levels Really Cause Depression?

The medical community have felt for a long while that low serotonin levels in the brain lead to depression — but there are several problems with that belief — and new research suggests neurogenesis holds a truer key to cure.

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