While we are alive, we are free to do what we choose and live with the consequences of our actions. After we have passed away, we would hope that it would not be possible to have choices about our future life made for us. This is precisely why it always bothers me when books are published after the passing of authors — particularly when the author requests that his notebooks be burned after his passing.


In the case of Nikolas Evans, it went a little deeper than that. At the young age of twenty-one, Nikolas died a brutal death at the hands of thugs. His mother could not bear the loss.

I sat at a picnic table and bawled for an hour. I never cried so hard. I talk to him four times a day and see him twice a week and now nothing. I couldn’t lose him. It was too important.

She decided the best course of action was to find a surrogate mother to bear the grandson she would not naturally have now that her son was dead. All she had to do was to have her son’s sperm taken from him and then use it to impregnate a surrogate, who would then have her grandchild.

I cannot think of a creepier thing for a mother to do.

“Everybody is telling me it’s unethical what I am doing,” said Evans. “But I raised him and he wanted children. I can’t get him to film school at UCLA and I couldn’t help him live his dream because someone has taken it away from him.”

How does stealing his sperm and creating a grandchild or even multiple grandchildren going to help Nikolas Evans live out his dreams? His dreams are gone and no grandchildren from stolen sperm will help to bring them back.

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