Jerald and his wife Matilda invited a number of friends over for their Thanksgiving dinner — it had its time changed a few times as Jerald and Matilda argued over the real meaning of dinner and how some people preferred having it closer to the evening and others liked it earlier in the afternoon.

Everyone who received their invitation understand that, unlike the traditional American Thanksgiving feast, this one would feature no flesh from any animal — four legged or two legged, with or without wings.

Most of them had the same question when they replied with an affirmative response — for they cared more about their company than what was being served on the table — being, “What are we going to eat and is there going to be enough food on the table to get us good and full by the time we walk off to the train?”

Jerald and Matilda anticipated that at least some of them were going to have this question in their minds and, as they brought out side dish after side dish, said that they should hopefully be wearing loose fitting clothing as they would be far less loose by the time the meal was over.

Every single guest’s eyebrow was raised as they perceived that the cranberries did not come out in gelatinous form in the shape of a can but had clearly been freshly cooked that day — as it turns out, in a maple syrup glaze.

Multiple large platters came out of the kitchen with various whole grains — black rice, brown rice, amaranth, quinoa, and even some millet, along with some chia seed pudding made with soy milk and plump raisins.

The piece de la resistance was their Tofurkey — they didn’t just toss it in the oven and hope for the best and indeed had their own secret recipe, a mixture of spices and herbs and oils that they knew was guaranteed to make a perfect Tofurkey.

By the time dessert had come out in the form of pumpkin pie with soy whipped cream, it was hard to even eat as they were quite full by then.

The guests all left happily, patting their bellies and feeling grateful for the meal that they ate.

Jerald and Matilda were quite grateful that they managed to feed as many people as they did without having to shed a drop of innocent blood in order to do so.

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