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I Had A Little Husband

by Tammy Tillotson

I had a little husband, no bigger than my thumb,
I put him in a pint pot, and there I bid him drum,
I bought a little handkerchief to wipe his little nose,
And a pair of little garters to tie his little hose.

–The Real Mother Goose

The Introduction
The lady over there by herself is Tammy…Ream…no, wait…Tillotson. It is Tillotson isn’t it? She did change her name back didn’t she? So-and-so said she’s separated, the poor dear. So-and-so’s friend said that she’s just going back to college to finish her education and that things have nothing to do with him. So-and-so’s friend of a friend overheard from her fifth cousin twice removed on her mother’s side of the family that it is true. She is getting a divorce.

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The True Ladybug

by Tammy Tillotson

You may think of me as an itty bitty little thing,
That turns bright crimson in color if you tickle my wing.
Yet I have a tale to tell, under these blushing cheeks
So please lend me your ear as this ladybug speaks.

The life of a ladybug is by far not stress free,
And stuck in a jar is not where I desire to be!
Even though air holes may be poked in the top
A jar’s not a home, and indeed that must stop!

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Ladybug Fly Away Home

by Tammy Tillotson

-Ladybug! Ladybug!
Fly away home.
Your house is on fire.
And your children are all gone.
All except one,
And that’s little Ann,
For she’s hiding under
The frying pan.

—Children’s Nursery Rhyme, author unknown

Nursery Rhymes are short little poems or verses which very young children find enjoyable and amusing. These precious rhymes are all too often set aside for the young, under the false assumption that adults have somehow outgrown their timeless lessons of banter and rhyme.

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Bingo!

by Tammy Tillotson

In 1930, Professor Carl Leffler developed a system of 6,000 bingo cards with non-repeating number groups. He later went insane. There are 1,474,200 unique Bingo cards possible, and only a handful of unique things to do for fun in a small town.

Bingo Hall of Fame
Since the last time someone’s unique idea resulted in an array of blue flashing lights, I recently decided that Bingo presented an argument of at least 1,474,197 different possibilities that might prove just as interesting as slow dancing in the median of Hwy 58 at midnight.

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Marry, Marry Quite Contrary

by Tammy Tillotson

Marry, Marry, Quite Contrary,
How do love gardens grow?
With wedding bells and shackled yells,
Am I ready to have baggage in tow?

In July 1997, Swing magazine polled 507 adults between the ages of 18-34, and 51% thought that the ideal age to marry was between 25-29, while only 16% thought the age should be higher.

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