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Why Cat People are Better than Dog Folk

We love cats.

We love dogs.

We love all animals.

We do not, however, love all animal owners and in our direct experience and in our non-scientific research, we have come to the following conclusion: Cat People are better than Dog Folk and we’ll tell you why.

Freedom Over Control
Cats love to roam while dogs hang around. Cats are active explorers; dogs merely accompany.

Cats are self-entertaining — dogs need to perform for others to find self-satisfaction.

Independence Over Obedience
You do not tell cats what to do; you only make suggestions. Dogs live to be ordered around.

Cats choose owners that believe in liberty, freedom and The American Way and that means cats are self-providers: They can hunt down and kill their own dinner.

Dogs are bound to those who leash, command, and demand slobbering affection; dogs depend on the kindness of others to have their feed bowls filled twice-a-day.

Cats climb trees and fall from them without getting hurt. Dogs chase cats up trees so they can wonder at the example of “Falling, But Living” in the example of Nine Lives.

Pooping Over Eating Poo
Cats do not eat their own poo — dogs do. Enough said.

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The Food Police Live Inside of Your Mouth

Do you believe your local government exists to protect you? Does your local government have the right to decide what you eat and how you eat it?
On Tuesday, New York City announced plans to require all trans fats gets cut out of your diet when you eat out whether you want it that way or not:

The New York City Board of Health voted unanimously yesterday to move forward with plans to prohibit the city’s 20,000 restaurants from serving food that contains more than a minute amount of artificial trans fats, the chemically modified ingredients considered by doctors and nutritionists to increase the risk of heart disease. …

If approved, the proposal voted on yesterday by the Board of Health would make New York the first large city in the country to strictly limit such fats in restaurants. Chicago is considering a similar prohibition affecting restaurants with less than $20 million in annual sales.
The New York prohibition would affect the city’s entire restaurant industry, by far the nation’s largest, from McDonald’s to fashionable bistros to street corner takeouts across the five boroughs. …
Officials said that the typical American diet now contains 5.8 grams of trans fats per day, and that a single five-ounce serving of French fries at many restaurants contained 8 grams of trans fats.

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The Naked Woe is Me Diet

A good friend of mine told me yesterday she lost 63 pounds in 90 days with the following diet plan. She would take off all her clothes in the morning and stand in front of a full-length mirror and yell at her fat body: “I hate you!” Then she’d shower, eat a small meal, get dressed and go to work — eat nothing for lunch — and when she returned home at night she would repeat her morning naked “I hate you!” ritual before she had a sensible dinner. She found success in her quest to lose weight.

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Dog Food

Does this image of a live dog being thrown into a shopping cart in China bother you?

Eating a Dog in China

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30 Second Rule

We’re all familiar with the five second rule where anything you drop on the ground can be picked up and eaten within five seconds of hitting the ground; but what about a 30 Second Rule where you can eat anything that hits the ground after waiting a full half minute before picking it up. Would you still eat something on the ground that had been there for 30 seconds? Does the 25 seconds really make that much a difference?

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Why Atkins went Bankrupt

The Atkins theory of weight loss went bankrupt last week as the company that manufactures the Atkins brand filed for Chapter 11 protection. The Atkins diet, in its last days, embraced a “balanced diet” of fruits and vegetables but the early hallmark of the diet mainly consisted of a high protein and low carb eating plan consisting of meats, eggs and cheeses and no starches.

I know a lot of people — mainly women — who swore by Atkins and I would always bet them they would not be on the diet in five years because it was unsustainable in the long term. They always bet me and six months later they had dropped Atkins. I have become rich betting against Atkins!

Here’s why Atkins doesn’t work:

1. High protein diets are dangerous. The body does not need much protein and by overwhelming your body with high levels of protein you are putting a great deal of pressure on your body to process (get rid of) protein it does not need.

2. Stressing the body with too much protein is one way that kind of diet would push the body to force it to work to process protein. That process would lead to burning calories.

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Killing Riccardo and Benjamin

From my Inbox:

A few months ago a lion and an 8-month-old elephant used by the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus were killed. Last year Ringling destroyed an 8-month-old elephant named Riccardo after he suffered irreparable fractures to both hind legs when he fell off a circus pedestal.

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