How FTD Ruined Mothers Day

Janna and I learned a hard lesson yesterday: FTD Ruined Mother’s Day!

Incompetence has many feral fathers and its talent for boorishness is born in a variety of floral colors and indigent mothers — but when it comes to ruining Mother’s Day tomorrow — FTD barely edges out the DHL delivery service for the ultimate “I poop on you!” grand prize.

Janna and I ordered a lovely $60.00 USD bouquet for Janna’s mom in Iowa from the online flower powerhouse FTD — I’ll show you the flowers here virtually tomorrow since that’s the only way they’re ever going to be delivered anywhere — and we were incredibly disappointed to learn yesterday the flowers would not be delivered as promised. 

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