There’s a scene in the 1998 Woody Allen film Celebrity which I have been thinking about lately. The main character, Lee, is having a conversation with his ex-wife and, in a move that essentially summarizes one of the main themes of the film, she says “When it comes to love, it’s luck.” Oh, how true those words are.

A Chance Job Opportunity
I was in the library one day in August, trying to find a job. By this point in the job search, I was fairly desperate. Everyone who wanted to offer me a job had dreams of me wearing a name tag and pushing their product and that was exactly what I had just managed to escape from. I was taking a couple of summer classes, and so I was in the New Brunswick area just about every day. It thus behooved me to find something in the local area. I wanted a job where I could make a decent amount of money and yet not work full time. I wanted something that would pay reasonably well yet not be in retail. What could I possibly find?

I used the computers in the library to try and find something through the Rutgers job database, but everything seemed out of my field of experience, and most of the deadlines had passed. I tried calling a law firm, but they already had enough people assisting them… they suggested I call during the Fall and see what I could find then. I didn’t want a job starting in the Fall, I wanted something that could start soon, very soon. Out of a bit of frustration, I approached the reference librarian and in a half joking manner, said “You would think, being that I am in the School of Communication, Information and Library Studies, one letter of which we are in, that I would be able to get a job at the library.” She said, “Well, we are looking for Information Desk Assistants.” Less than two hours later, I was shaking her hand – I got a job.

I Meet Andrea
As part of the training for the job, I was to work with people who were already Information Desk Assistants. We would both work, and I would learn about the job while on it. On a couple of occasions I worked with Andrea, who had been working at the library since the previous April. The first time we worked together, I showed her my online journal and my web magazine, and other things I could find to entertain and amuse her. I found her to be a fun, interesting, and intelligent individual. It was thus that we began our friendship.

Lunch with Andrea
Andrea and I started having lunch together once a week and that eventually led up to twice a week.  We would get together at places such as Stuff Yer Face, Tumulty’s, and Evelyn’s, eat lunch or dinner, and talk about our lives, what was happening, who we were dating, and that sort of thing. Beer would often be involved, which to me was a great improvement over the last person I had been spending quality time with, so to speak. Andrea would talk to me in great detail about things that she thought about, ideas that she had. I realized then that she was quite a brilliant individual, and every time we had lunch together I was happy to be in the presence of such an intelligent individual. Sometimes I have difficultly talking to people because I make too many silly jokes and puns, and I refer to things they have never heard of which are, I admit, mostly obscure. This has never been the case with Andrea. I felt a great sort of connection with Andrea that I hadn’t felt with all too many people – in retrospect, I suppose that could have been taken to be a good sign of what was to come.

I came to know of her interests, and she of mine. Andrea is one of the few people I know who is a fan of Dr. Who. She is also quite fond of Sanrio, books, poetry, creativity in general, and many other things that I would list immediately if you were to ask me what things interest me. We both use typewriters, believe it or not.

One day, I was particularly flirty. I didn’t cross any lines, mind you, being that she was with someone at the time, but I felt comfortable flirting with her. On a different occasion, in the evening, Andrea acknowledged that she found me to be quite attractive. Perhaps it was that she had a little something to drink that evening. Who knows? Later on in the evening, I drove her home. I played a couple of songs I wanted her to hear. In the span of about half an hour, she hugged me about five times, and it seemed fairly obvious that she wanted to kiss me. I wouldn’t, though, as she was with someone.

I must have blushed like a tomato that evening. It was quite flattering that someone older than me, having had experience in the world of dating, would actually be interested in me. Alas, it seemed that nothing would come of this interest. Though it seemed from her conversations that her present relationship wasn’t exactly the best in the world, it wasn’t something she seemed likely to put an end to any time soon.

Then one day, Andrea came into the library, slightly teary. I wondered to myself if, perhaps, her boyfriend broke up with her? As it turns out, I was correct. Her boyfriend had broken up with her. We talked about it quite a bit that day. Since then, we have gotten together and, though we have been through some difficult times, I have come to see something: Andrea is the one. That connection I feel with her is, in fact, unique. In the movie She’s Gotta Have It, the character of Jamie says “I believe that there is only one person, only one in this world that is meant to be your soul mate, your lifelong companion.”

I believe Andrea is that person.

Conclusion
When it comes to love, it’s luck. Can you believe how really true that statement is? If you’ve read my article Musings on Mating, you can see that I never really had much of this luck thing. Being with Andrea, though, has made up for all of that. Don’t give up on love. You might even know the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with right now.