Without further ado, here are the 


Top Ten Things a Man Never Wants to Hear from a Woman and, mind you, I have never had any of these ever said to me.


1. We need to talk. 

2. I need space. 
3. You’re not funny. 
4. Take out the garbage. 
5. My mother is coming for a visit. 
6. We are going to visit my mother. 
7. Stop being needy. 
8. I don’t mind average men. 
9. When is my birthday? 
10. Any sentence containing the word “relationship.”

36 Comments

  1. I’ve never asked this question (I promise, I’ve always thought it was stupid), but my husband hates to hear a woman ask “What are you thinking?”

  2. Hi Carla!
    It bothers us because it’s a trick question!
    We know there can only be one acceptable answer: “You.”
    Anything else and we’re in big trouble! :mrgreen:

  3. Yes, there’s no good answer to that, and actually, I prefer not to know every little thought my husband has.
    Things would just be better that way! 😀

  4. Ok…I spoke a little too quickly. The ones about the mother are things I hate to hear from him. I’ve found, in my experience, that the guy’s mother is the difficult one not the girl’s mother. Erik’s mother is…exhausting…in a good way of course 😆 The rest is me I guess but he doesn’t mind.

  5. Hmmm… that’s interesting analysis, Robin. I always thought the old chestnut was men dreaded spending any time at all with their mother-in-law because she’s an older, meaner and bitterer version of the woman they married. :mrgreen:
    A good one I left off the list because I loved the mother-in-law spin is “Do I look fat in this outfit?” The required answer to that question must be: “You always look great!” 😀

  6. And the three things a man ever needs to say to a woman in response to any of her questions listed are;
    Uh-huh
    Right
    Sorry

  7. Well said, Ric!
    The key to a happy relationship with a woman is to always be wrong and always agree with her when she tells you you’re wrong! 🙂

  8. I once had a boyfriend say to me “I don’t like beautiful women” 😆 I think the only way to understand women is time. After many times of putting your foot in your mouth it all starts to become clear.
    As far as the guy’s mother-in-law I know that my mother in law is extremely difficult and my mother’s mother-in-law is the WORST of the batch. I think it has something to do with no woman ever being good enough for their perfect son.

  9. David, You forgot the biggest line that men always hate to hear: “Let just be friends.”
    That’s the worst.
    Once you are in the relationship, the key as pointed out earlier is to admit that you are always wrong and she’s always right. That’s the key to my marriage 😉

  10. Oh, Robin, that’s a painful story about dating “beautiful women” and I hope you got rid of him fast! I find many men continue to make the same mistake and never ever really learn anything when it comes to successfully dealing with a good woman in a great relationship. 🙂 I’m not speaking from any personal knowledge or experience, really. No, really! 😉
    I think the solution to the mother-in-law dilemma is to only date orphans. :mrgreen:

  11. Chris!
    Yes, you’re right. I understand. I won’t do it again. I agree with you. Yes, of course, I love you! 🙂
    I also agree with your additional line and I know this may come as a disappointment to some naive women :mrgreen: — but I was taught early in life men and women can never be “friends.” They can work together. They can get along, but the definition of “friends” is too gender specific to ever really work out.
    I was also told there’s too much innate sexual tension between the sexes for a man to ever really, truly, “be friends with” a woman unless she’s ugly, stupid or the guy is gay. :mrgreen:
    I believe many men have a habit of misinterpreting kindness from women as affection.

  12. Well luckily my mother-in-law lives all the way in Florida but that might be worse because she feels she has to be MORE involved and call more because she isn’t here 🙂
    Oh that guy was a Frat Guy (that’s how I explain it) he just said he doesn’t like the “typically beautiful girls but the more modest” or something like that. It’s fine, I just gave him a look and he appologized a lot for how it sounded. I’m certainly not scarred by it.

  13. Is your mother-in-law aware of all your blogs, Robin? If not, let’s get her involved with you there, too. :mrgreen:
    I’m glad you weren’t scarred by the Frat Guy, but it’s too bad you still have to remember what he said.

  14. Oh I remember all the stupid things that there is no need to remember but the important things seem to fade out of my memory.
    She does know about my blog at least my main one. She sent an email once saying how great it was to get to know me better and gave me a ton of questions to add…which I did. She can be the nicest person in the world and the next day the most infuriating. She’s visiting at the end of the month 😀

  15. I’ve made it pretty clear where she stands with me and she says she admires that I come out and tell her the truth. Mind you she had many issues with her last daughter-in-law so I’m still fighting to prove I have no intention of being like what she had gotten used to.

  16. Men and women can be friends (well some of them anyways), it’s exes that can’t be friends. I have yet to be friends with one of mine and I know it’s not just me. One of them refuses to speak to me even if we run into each other, havent figured that one out yet and it is too much of a bother to even attempt to try to find out.
    I have said you are not funny a few times though 🙂

  17. You know…with his ex and his mother and the rest…I have. Only problem is HE is perfect for me. Ah well…I’d rather deal with that than have some emotionally unavailable guy who wants me to be a different person.

  18. hterry — You are right about exes. I think men especially draw a bright and hard line about there not being any more contact. 🙂
    Robin — That makes sense, Robin, though you both might want to head for the hills together! 😉

  19. Oh we’ve definitely thought of heading for the hills together. If he didn’t have a child we probably would have years ago.
    No, being friends with ex’s does not work…at least not for me.

  20. I’m friends with two of my ex’s … well my ex “boyfriends” not ex-spouses… my ex-husband and I … well. No. Let’s not go there. (Yes let’s not)

  21. sometimes being friends with your x’s is ok… especially if u werent too close to them anyways…. but the ones that broke your heart, or the ones you were close to, like a husband for instance, is a totally different story…… not so easy to be friends with them. ttyl -mel-

  22. 1. We need to talk.
    2. I need space.
    3. You’re not funny.
    4. Take out the garbage.
    5. My mother is coming for a visit.
    6. We are going to visit my mother.
    7. Stop being needy.
    8. I don’t mind average men.
    9. When is my birthday?
    10. Any sentence containing the word “relationship.”
    These are so cliche and I happen to hear most of them quite often. Sad to tell! I think I’ve heard them all except number 8. Really! who says that?!
    I firmly believe if number’s 1,2, and 10 are spoken, there is either a serious disconnect in communication, OR, there is great communication. I dwell in the latter. If the problems aren’t talked about, they lead to the negative. I’ve had to rehash certain problems over and over. But, they don’t seem to get fixed because I don’t believe I’m being taken seriously or I’m not communicating the right information. So.. Another “we need to talk” is on the horizon somewhere. Heh!

  23. Hi,i think i might have made a massive blunder today y asking my boyfriend,”how did you and your ex break-up”.He had a massive fit and he refuses to speak to me.I don’t knwo does this mean his still in love with her?

  24. Hey tania!
    Welcome to the blog!
    Yes, that’s a question that should never be asked — the answer should only be offered.
    I’m sure he likely felt you were trying to entrap him now with the mistakes of past behavior. There’s no way for him to answer that question with the fear of you using it against him now or in the future.
    The best way to remedy this is to laughingly go up to him and say: “Let’s forget I ever asked you that question and move on!” That way he’s off the emotional tenterhook on which you hanged him.

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