We all know and love the beloved and familiar chestnut Real Men always round down. We also know a Real Man never asks for directions while women don’t mind asking and when a man and a woman are lost together and the woman asks a stranger for directions against the better will of The Real Man, that Real Man can never live down the tender loss of his manhood.
What about the innate sense of navigation men have when both endpoints of the destination are known? Isn’t “getting there fast” the mantra and the desire of the Real Man?
The shortest distance between two points is a straight line and every Real Man will take the shortest route — even if it means clambering across a junkyard of weeds, driving through an alley or speeding around a bad part of town — if it means getting there faster than you previously arrived.
Janna walks quicker than everyone we know, but I can always beat her to where we’re going if we aren’t walking together because she takes the long way — The Polite Way — and waits for the lights to change to cross the street and she stays in lighted areas. I, on the other hand — and as a True Real Man — will cut across backyards, race through a dog run, and hop a security fence at a lawyer’s office parking lot to lop a corner or two off my destination.
The shortest distance between two points — in the mind of a Real Man — is found in the infinite space between his ears and that is a destination no Real Woman should ever wish to know or seek to find!