Jennifer Love Hewitt is upset the world knows she has a giant, dimpled, dumper.

We
agree with her that the size of her butt should not define her, but her
big butt is fair play, as they say, because she is in the public eye
and wants attention and money from her public fame on television and in
movies and her exposed rump roast is the price of that meaty admission
to celebrity.


If Ms. Hewitt doesn’t want her rear mocked, she should cover it up and leave her lonesome masses guessing. 

When
she provides a clear shot of her bumpy bum, she’s inventing delight and
inviting ogling as we willfully ride along on her backside’s bumply
ride.

Celebrities cannot have it both ways. 

They shall not lead private lives while begging our public admiration.

The
wages of celebrity is the death of the private self — and if you don’t
like it, retire from the entertainment industry, and move to a farm in
Idaho, and keep your panties wide and your britches on.