There’s nothing more gross, messy and revolting than realizing that taking care of your daily bathroom business is going to spank you double time in the wallet through no fault of your own — except for uninspired brand loyalty.  Here’s my favorite bathroom tissue:  Scott Rapid-Dissolving.  I like it because it works as advertised and it is smooth and silky.

The second the paper hits the water, it begins to disintegrate and that
makes for easy, nonplussed flushing.  These four-roll packs are heavy
at 800 one-ply sheets per roll for a total of 348.8 sq feet per package.

I buy all my paper products in bulk from Amazon, so many months can pass before it is time to reorder. 

When I placed my Amazon order for more of the Scott Rapid-Dissolving, I noticed the bulk price had risen by about $20.00USD.  I was disappointed in the price increase in these trying economic times, but poop we must, and so I clicked-to-buy.

When the new order arrived and I unpacked the box, I immediately knew something was wrong.  There was a major weight problem.  The original packages were heavy.  The new packages were lightweight.    

I compared the fine print. 

My horror is shared with you below. 

The new Scott Rapid-Dissolving bathroom tissue had shrunk from 800 to 352 one-ply sheets and from 348.8 to 164 sq feet!

Now that, my friend, is a classic ripoff!  Scott raised the price $20.00USD and then shrank the product in half!

How do companies have the gall to pull of such an obvious bait-and-switch routine? 

The original Scott Rapid-Dissolving was tough, strong and smooth, while its pale replacement is light, a little sticky and it has a new, rougher, feel that is unfriendly in the most private of places. 

What sort of goons take a delightful experience and then charge you more for greater pain?  I know there’s a joke lurking somewhere in there about Congress, greased pigs, and shooting monkeys in a barrel — but all I really care about is regaining what I lost:  The best toilet tissue in the world. 

I must now accept I’ll never feel that secret pleasure again and I am full of rage and anger as Scott plays with my pocketbook while messing around with my butt!


  1. A few of my friends are getting into installing bidets on their toilets and using those instead of using any paper at all. Not everyone likes a good tush wash after using the toilet but it’s certainly paperless! 🙂
    Sad that companies keep mucking about with our wallets while giving us less and less.

  2. I can see the advantage of a bidet, Gordon — but how do they wipe the water from their bums if they aren’t using toilet tissue?
    I can’t think of a more blatant ripoff of the doubling of the price of the product while providing half of the original.

  3. Apparently a lot of bidets will… air dry you.
    Have you found any alternatives to the company that are soft and septic tank friendly?

  4. Ah! The newfangled bidet things. Air drying is a good thing, Gordon! I like this Scott tissue paper best because it is incredibly thin and flushes well. We don’t have a septic tank issue, but sometimes the water pressure isn’t so great and stuff gets easily clogged. The “thick and fluffy” and “quilted” TP is such a waste of time and money and they really expand in water instead of coming apart. My all time favorite is Scott Single Roll 1,200 Sheets… really thin and rough, but they’re getting harder to find — “fluffy” sells better, I guess — and Amazon is very limited in the bulk brands they stock.

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