The perversion of the historical accuracy of how our ancestors lived, and how we currently live, is created by preserving only expensive possessions — tokens, icons, valuables – and in the purposeful construction of indestructible architectural monuments used by the privileged few.

History is skewed by this preservation technique because it only pretends to tell future generations how people actually lived. When we visit museums we are only seeing what the powerful majority of the culture of that time deemed important enough to save and pass down.

We only get to know what they thought was worth saving and inevitably those things are the expensive, the pretty, the unique and the tokens of the wealthy. Even pioneer and Native American museum dioramas are idealized with hardy items and the most beautiful things. The ordinary is forsaken for the power of the inherent value in the preservation of the perceived best.

Only the rich could afford to be photographed. Poor and middle class cultures were not worth preserving because they lived temporary lives where none of the iconic resonances of the environment and the neighborhood were able to live on because Ghettos were gutted; middle class valuables wore out under reasonable, everyday, use and were thrown away. A disposable culture creates forgotten people.

Only monolithic buildings survive generational changes as they become living headstones to the architects who planned them and the cities that built them. This skewing of history in favor of the wealthy — because only they have things deemed worth preserving — and not what was necessary to most people, is a bright line of discrimination that avoids the truth and celebrates the facade.

When you visit antique stores you see enduring, beautiful things, because the everyday and the vital were used up over the span of a lifetime and are no longer available.

Time capsules are an arbitrary attempt to preserve the moment, but they do not preserve the actual living of the life in perspective. Time capsules are anecdotal and not universal. Think of the things, and share with us here, that were passed down to you from your relatives: an expensive pocket watch, a bejeweled brooch, a house, diamond earrings, an engraved pen.

Then consider, and share with us here, what you plan to hand down from your generation and tell us if you’re handing it down because it has cultural value or because the item itself is valuable.

Then wonder, and share with us here, what you could pass down that is not museum quality and has no resale value — but indicates your lifetime and your wishes and your wants and the resonant reality of your life. Then decide, and share with us here, what you would pass down for preservation in a museum that would inform future generations about the incidental infrastructure, the fleeting architecture and the everlasting construction of values in your life and not the shallow valuables and intentional monuments surrounding you.

78 Comments

  1. You should really log all of that stuff, Dave, and get those sermons transcribed before the reel-to-reel tape becomes obsolete. You should get all the live recording digitized. I love the silver “Gibson” on the headstock! Very cool!

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  2. Hi David,
    Sometimes we also forget how harsh conditions were in the “olden days” because of the idealized vision of life during those times presented by many museums.
    I always have the notion that life in the early days was idylic. People must have spent their days out in the sunshine, enjoying cool breezes and watching the crops grow as they read the classics with their children.
    It isn’t like that today for modern farmers with all of their equipment, so rationally it wouldn’t make sense for it to be like that back in the 1600s and 1700s, but for some reason, my vision of early America makes me think of a museum version of Monticello or the historic Shakertown in Kentucky.
    Back in the “good old days” laws had to be passed to force people to bury their indentured servants, instead of just throwing them out with the trash for wild animals to eat.
    From PBS’ History Detectives, link above.

    Noel shows me a 1662 law from Maryland’s neighboring colony of Virginia.
    Noel: The law says a “burial of servants or others privately prohibited.” and the act goes on to say that “it is against that barbarous custom of exposing the corpses of the dead to the prey of hogs and other vermin.” …
    Gwen: So we know that Virginia colonists often treated the bodies of their indentured servants with complete disregard. …
    Gwen: Then I show him the final piece of evidence I found, a law proposed in 1663 outlawing the private burial of servants
    in Maryland.
    Cory: I can’t believe it had to be put in writing.
    Gwen: Passing laws is an indication of how prevalent a practice has become.

    People who didn’t care anything about humans probably cared very little about anything else, so it makes sense that only the most expensive items survived beyond their time.

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  3. Excellent comment, Chris! I love your link!
    It is unfortunate so much was lost. Now we realize the valuable of the ordinary to inform the future but without the past we don’t know how we lived before.
    Ancient Egypt still holds many secrets and we are lucky that in addition to kings and their court, some loyal common slaves were interred along with their masters to provide shards of the commoner experience back then.
    Our own common history of slavery is just awe-inspiring. We have no idea what it must have been like, yet, in many ways, we have romanticized that awful past.
    You’re right that the early years were hard and unforgiving and there probably wasn’t anything at all worth saving anywhere. That antiquity is lost to us forever.
    What do you plan to pass down?

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  4. Hi David,
    I don’t know if there’s anything material to pass down that will stand the test of time in my possession right now.
    I guess I’ll have to pass down knowledge, since most things in today’s society are “throwaway” disposable items.
    I was thinking this issue not too long ago when we were cleaning up a room in our basement that had become a storage/home office over the years.
    Items that we hadn’t used for more than a year have been packed up to be dropped off at Goodwill.
    Old law books that are several editions too old will go to the local library for their book sale. (Using Westlaw via the internet is easier than finding something in a book anyway.)
    Two old printers were set out on the curb and one was immediately picked up by someone passing by. There’s a group of people who cruise neighborhoods the evening before trash pickup who gather treasures that others cast away. They picked up an old sink and a bathtub that had been cut in half when we were redoing one of our bathrooms.
    I’m somewhat of a minimalist at heart.
    Feng Shui suggests clutter is bad. I’ve always noticed I feel better if I’m in a “clean” environment where everything is relatively orderly.
    I don’t enjoy myself if I have a lot of items clogging up the house. I’d rather have a few items and donate anything that I haven’t used for a while so that others can get some benefit from the items.
    I’d rather not pass along goods that become obsolete, break, wear out, or rust.
    I’d rather pass along some sort of knowlegde that will be useful for the future generations.

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  5. To those who know me – memories be they in the mind or in photographs.
    My daughters already argue over my clothes and my jewellery and who is getting what.
    The net is also littered in too many places with my outpourings of “wisdom”.
    I hope my children will keep the book collection the family has amassed and the family photographs (I have a museum in the attic).
    I have a collection of signed books, signed original prints and a very extensive adult toy collection – enough to start my own museum! Not quite sure if they would want to keep those – or what museum would take them!
    Actually the more I think about it, the more I feel as if I am living in a *living museum*.
    I still use some of the furniture my parents did, my 90 year old mother was born in one of the beds we still use. I have some of the paintings and prints that were in my grandmothers house and I still use the heavy duty “Sheffield stainless steel” frying pan, given to my mother on her wedding day 55 years ago.
    I think if pushed I would offer up my craft basket and scrapbooks – the one with all the bits and bobs saved over the years, the ribbons, pictures, buttons, keepsakes – memories again.

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  6. Chris!
    I’m with you! I don’t like a lot of stuff around — except books… all books — when we move I am rather vicious about throwing stuff away. I just don’t want it wondering if I will one day need it again or not. Sometimes I miss what I feel I should have that I tossed away, but I quickly get over that notion because space and time are so desperately tight.
    Mementos have never interested me, but tokens of my own invention like my magic pen are always pleasing to have with me and to one day pass along the glory and the wondering.
    One of my NYC mentors decorated his entire loft with “found furniture” he picked up for free on the street. It was an eclectic and magnificent mix of tastes and refinement.

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  7. Nicola —
    How does one pass down memories? Through stories and photographs alone or are there other means?
    Now an “adult toy museum” would be neat! DO IT! You’ll pay off the house!
    😀
    Your 90-year-old stuff is fascinating! Was that stuff kept for its functional use or its nostalgic attachment? Do you do anything special to care for the old furniture or is it hardier than what we purchase today?
    I wonder how much of the keen things you listed would be accepted by a “proper museum” for keeping and display? Or is history only what we individually value?
    This gives a whole new perspective on the imperative to get that house in your hands to continue the wonderment of your personal history embedded in its timbers!

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  8. Hi David,
    One of these days, I’d like to have custom shelves build and make a home library.
    The books I’m donating are old textbooks that were so expensive when I bought them, but that dropped to $5 when it came time to resell them.
    Since the cases they contain are highly edited for educational purposes, they aren’t really that useful for “real” usage.
    I should buy more books, but I usually look and browse at the bookstore, then go to the library to check out the books.
    The same thing goes for movies and other entertainment.
    I never really collected lots of CDs — I always sold or traded them when I got tired of them. I never did buy any VHS tapes or DVDs.

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  9. Dave —
    Please use the FEEDBACK tab in your Dashboard Admin panel to tell the support folks your Avatar is not loading here. Everyone else’s loads but yours. They need to fix it for ye!
    😀
    Merkins have a long and funny history! I think they’re super!
    :mrgreen:
    You may be right about the hygiene issue — but way back then didn’t everyone smell and not bathe?

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  10. Chris —
    Books are my love and my tools. I write in them. I bend them up. I dog-ear pages. I put lots of sticky notes in them pointing to things I need to memorize later.
    I do like owning DVDs of movies I watch. It gives me a sense of finality and belonging that renting does not fulfill.
    There are certain TV shows — The Dick Cavett Show, Mary Tyler Moore, The Partridge Family, Bob Newhart — that I love owning because it tethers me back to a time when life was greater and the TV writing was incredibly Golden.

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  11. I think that I will leave a grain of sand from everywhere I’ve traveled on vacation (and I haven’t had many) who’s going to fight to be in my will now?

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  12. Dave —
    Now you’re getting down to the nut of it. What do we value and why? Why do we value a velvet sofa from 1865, yet we scoff at a sharecropper’s hoe from the same period even though they were both from the same farm?
    Old things — like your guitar — are given value and importance to other people because of their provenance. It is your duty as the current owner of the guitar to preserve the story and to mandate that record. Write it down. Transcribe the sermons. Include the recordings. They all stand together stronger than they fall apart.
    Your cutting board is important because of the value you provide for the rest of us. If it has no value to you, then is has no value to us.

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  13. A S!
    You’re back!
    😀
    We missed your mind and spirit!
    I love your grain of sand idea. It reminds me of the Jewish tradition of visiting graves. Every visitor leaves a stone behind on the tombstone. There are no names. Stone size does not matter. The stone indicates a presence: Someone cared enough to visit.
    The rock speaks from its history in the earth and also forward into the expectation of the spirit of those in the future who choose to visit and, perhaps, leave a rock of their own.

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  14. That’s a cool tradition. I figured sand is less disgusting than what some other people I know will leave. There’s this one guy I know who plans to leave his offspring his toenail / fingernail collection which he started in Junior High / High School years. But I suppose he is giving more of himself.

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  15. How does one pass down memories? Through stories and photographs alone or are there other means?
    Sharing the experience and making the memories 🙂
    Stories, photographs and some of the objects themselves. We have a fmily habit of telling stories and remembering the year/s at Christmas and New Year and birthdays.
    Now an “adult toy museum” would be neat! DO IT! You’ll pay off the house!
    😀
    That is quite a tempting idea – not sure how practical it would be.
    Your 90-year-old stuff is fascinating! Was that stuff kept for its functional use or its nostalgic attachment? Do you do anything special to care for the old furniture or is it hardier than what we purchase today?
    The bed is a mixture of the two. It gets polished and oiled several times a year. It is unusual in that it is a high bed by modern standards and works well in the cottage – far better than a moderm equivalent. The chest of drawers are also of a similar age – they are far better than the modern equivalent and have outlasted several bought in the mean time. Again they get polished regularly.
    I wonder how much of the keen things you listed would be accepted by a “proper museum” for keeping and display? Or is history only what we individually value?
    Probably not a lot – maybe some of the books and maybe some of my records (vinyl). Although now having developed this train of thought that might be what my children would keep.
    This gives a whole new perspective on the imperative to get that house in your hands to continue the wonderment of your personal history embedded in its timbers!
    I am working on it !

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  16. Dave —
    I agree it would be valuable to trace the histories of recipes and food.
    I think history and tradition are made by individuals and not their societies just like museums are initially the vision of one person who made the decision to create something from nothing and I offer Steven Spielberg as a recent, shining, example.
    Oral history has the habit of changing over time. That’s part of the reason for Steven Spielberg’s work recording the memories of the Holocaust survivors for the Shoah Foundation at USC:
    http://www.usc.edu/schools/college/vhi/
    He founded Shoah after he made “Schindler’s List” — so all Holocaust victims could tell their story on the record.
    Now that’s an invaluable history that has no resale value or prettiness except to brightly remember the ugly and dark side of what we are all capable of deep down if the circumstances are just right and good people don’t stand up to stop it.

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  17. Nicola!
    Yes! Forsake the new HDTV for the old house!
    :mrgreen:
    Your house and furniture sound amazing. I think there is great value in the longevity of the furniture and if I were starting a museum I would want you stuff in it to show how the real people lived — who cares about the kings and queens when the better people are available for preserving?

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  18. Nicola!
    Yes! Forsake the new HDTV for the old house!
    :mrgreen:
    Your house and furniture sound amazing. I think there is great value in the longevity of the furniture and if I were starting a museum I would want you stuff in it to show how the real people lived — who cares about the kings and queens when the better people are available for preserving?

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  19. My great grand father was an artist, and we have a couple of beautiful landscapes painted by him at our house. Those are more than 100 years old but are still gorgeous. He used to use a ‘Sheaffer’ fountain pen that he gave my Mom when she passed her school final exam with flying colors! My Mom still has it!
    My great grand mother wanted to name me as ‘Sudeshna’ (name of an ancient Indian queen) which was discarded by my grand father and my dad – as the name sounded too goofy to them. I still adore the name and carry it in my heart. My horoscope was made after this name. Though I don’t pay much attention to my horoscope but I am glad my Mom used the name given by my great grand mother.
    I am still in the quest for finding something worth to pass on which will be adored after three generation – may be a journal of my own experience!
    Finally, a happy thanksgiving to all! 😀

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  20. My great grand father was an artist, and we have a couple of beautiful landscapes painted by him at our house. Those are more than 100 years old but are still gorgeous. He used to use a ‘Sheaffer’ fountain pen that he gave my Mom when she passed her school final exam with flying colors! My Mom still has it!
    My great grand mother wanted to name me as ‘Sudeshna’ (name of an ancient Indian queen) which was discarded by my grand father and my dad – as the name sounded too goofy to them. I still adore the name and carry it in my heart. My horoscope was made after this name. Though I don’t pay much attention to my horoscope but I am glad my Mom used the name given by my great grand mother.
    I am still in the quest for finding something worth to pass on which will be adored after three generation – may be a journal of my own experience!
    Finally, a happy thanksgiving to all! 😀

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  21. I am not paying for the new TV !
    I have just thought of something else that will be passed down to my children – our Christmas tree ornaments. Some of them that I have now are my grandmothers which she made as a child. Simple felt shapes with trims sewn on by hand, by her. Most of them have a tale attached, and some were made by mother as well as my children.
    In the UK we have a wonderful organisation called the National Trust
    http://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/ (of which I am a life member). They specialise in restoring and maintaining historical houses and their contents as well as preserving heritage coastline.
    They are often gifted complete houses and contents – snapshots in time – as well as stately homes and gardens.

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  22. I am not paying for the new TV !
    I have just thought of something else that will be passed down to my children – our Christmas tree ornaments. Some of them that I have now are my grandmothers which she made as a child. Simple felt shapes with trims sewn on by hand, by her. Most of them have a tale attached, and some were made by mother as well as my children.
    In the UK we have a wonderful organisation called the National Trust
    http://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/ (of which I am a life member). They specialise in restoring and maintaining historical houses and their contents as well as preserving heritage coastline.
    They are often gifted complete houses and contents – snapshots in time – as well as stately homes and gardens.

    Like

  23. Katha!
    I LOVE YOUR NEW AVATAR! You have so many looks. Every time you upload something you are a new and fascinating woman!!!
    😀
    You should look at your Guest Author biography and see if there are any changes you wish to make. You can email me your new Avatar (80×80 or 96×96) and I will use it in place of the one you have online now.
    I love the name Sudeshna and I’m sure you will find even more ways to honor it in your life time. What does your current name mean?
    I think ancient cultures have much more respect and understanding for valuing the un-valuable as hundreds of years tumble by.
    The plundering of the Iraq museum by street goons shows there is a cultural understanding of what is valued. I have a hard time believing if the USA were similarly invaded by a foreign army that we would see the same sort of rush to plunder the Smithsonian.
    The Iraqis may be poor and hungry, but they know the taste and history of their culture.
    Your family’s appreciation of art and the simple, powerful, pen speaks great volumes about cherishing and appreciating what formed you. It’s just terrific.
    That really is the test, Katha, and you see it clearly — “What do I have to pass down that will have significance and importance to other people three generations forward; ten generations forward; a hundred hundred generations onward…”
    It’s a large task, but isn’t that the purpose of our living — to have significance and relevance beyond the immediate breath?
    Some call it a yearning for immortality. I call it a responsibility to live the life you are given now.

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  24. Katha!
    I LOVE YOUR NEW AVATAR! You have so many looks. Every time you upload something you are a new and fascinating woman!!!
    😀
    You should look at your Guest Author biography and see if there are any changes you wish to make. You can email me your new Avatar (80×80 or 96×96) and I will use it in place of the one you have online now.
    I love the name Sudeshna and I’m sure you will find even more ways to honor it in your life time. What does your current name mean?
    I think ancient cultures have much more respect and understanding for valuing the un-valuable as hundreds of years tumble by.
    The plundering of the Iraq museum by street goons shows there is a cultural understanding of what is valued. I have a hard time believing if the USA were similarly invaded by a foreign army that we would see the same sort of rush to plunder the Smithsonian.
    The Iraqis may be poor and hungry, but they know the taste and history of their culture.
    Your family’s appreciation of art and the simple, powerful, pen speaks great volumes about cherishing and appreciating what formed you. It’s just terrific.
    That really is the test, Katha, and you see it clearly — “What do I have to pass down that will have significance and importance to other people three generations forward; ten generations forward; a hundred hundred generations onward…”
    It’s a large task, but isn’t that the purpose of our living — to have significance and relevance beyond the immediate breath?
    Some call it a yearning for immortality. I call it a responsibility to live the life you are given now.

    Like

  25. Nicola!
    I love the tree ornaments. They are pieces of art and memory in the same moment.
    As I said to Katha — living in a culture that appreciates the rich history of its people is important and your fine involvement in the National Trust proves that point.
    Here in the USA historic homes and buildings and land are routinely destroyed into dust if the price is right — even if the original qualifies for some sort of National Register protection.
    http://www.cr.nps.gov/nr/

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  26. Nicola!
    I love the tree ornaments. They are pieces of art and memory in the same moment.
    As I said to Katha — living in a culture that appreciates the rich history of its people is important and your fine involvement in the National Trust proves that point.
    Here in the USA historic homes and buildings and land are routinely destroyed into dust if the price is right — even if the original qualifies for some sort of National Register protection.
    http://www.cr.nps.gov/nr/

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  27. Wow! Nicola, your parents gave you a lifetime! That membership is not a cheap gift. What great people! Did you ask for that gift or did they just know you’d like it?
    Thanks for the blog link. Very interesting stuff! Love the idea!
    I appreciate your good wishes for tomorrow. No big plans here. I just finished the first draft of my blog entry for tomorrow.
    :mrgreen:

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  28. Wow! Nicola, your parents gave you a lifetime! That membership is not a cheap gift. What great people! Did you ask for that gift or did they just know you’d like it?
    Thanks for the blog link. Very interesting stuff! Love the idea!
    I appreciate your good wishes for tomorrow. No big plans here. I just finished the first draft of my blog entry for tomorrow.
    :mrgreen:

    Like

  29. David, thank you!
    Glad that you liked my avatar! The picture was taken by my grand son (:D) and I was completely unaware of it. I don’t know why it is not loading here even if I am commenting even if after logging in in wordpress.
    “Deshna” means gift in Sanskrit, “Su” means beautiful. So “Sudeshna” comes down to “a beautiful gift.”
    “Katha” means story, a way of communication and “Kali” means a flower – now you can do the permutaion/combination of my name the way you want!!!
    I think one thing I would defilitely like to pass on that is “quest for knowledge” – don’t know how though!
    I wish to collect a designer Mont Blanc one day…may be through that! 😀

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  30. David, thank you!
    Glad that you liked my avatar! The picture was taken by my grand son (:D) and I was completely unaware of it. I don’t know why it is not loading here even if I am commenting even if after logging in in wordpress.
    “Deshna” means gift in Sanskrit, “Su” means beautiful. So “Sudeshna” comes down to “a beautiful gift.”
    “Katha” means story, a way of communication and “Kali” means a flower – now you can do the permutaion/combination of my name the way you want!!!
    I think one thing I would defilitely like to pass on that is “quest for knowledge” – don’t know how though!
    I wish to collect a designer Mont Blanc one day…may be through that! 😀

    Like

  31. It was a total suprise – and has been a great joy over the years.
    I had a feeling that you would be “minding the shop” – so to speak. It does not surprise me that you have already got tomorrows blog ready to go.
    Gravatar.com seems to be having considerable problems at the moment.
    Katha – both you and your name are beautiful.

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  32. It was a total suprise – and has been a great joy over the years.
    I had a feeling that you would be “minding the shop” – so to speak. It does not surprise me that you have already got tomorrows blog ready to go.
    Gravatar.com seems to be having considerable problems at the moment.
    Katha – both you and your name are beautiful.

    Like

  33. Hi Katha!
    Your Avatar is loading just fine. I see it.
    Your “grand son” — I think you’re going to have to explain that one to us!
    😆
    Love the names, Katha, thanks! You are my “Flower Tale” now and forever!
    Knowledge is a Golden Circle that must be eternally forged. I know you will have a great role in continuing that education.
    My “Magic Pen” is a black Mont Blanc rollerball. I’ve had thousands of expensive pens –- fountain pens, regular pens, exotic writing instruments, etc. — over my lifetime, but the Mont Blanc rollerball writes the best blue ink I have ever experienced. It isn’t messy. It has a smooth motion. It makes me want to write more. It’s magical!
    😀

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  34. Hi Katha!
    Your Avatar is loading just fine. I see it.
    Your “grand son” — I think you’re going to have to explain that one to us!
    😆
    Love the names, Katha, thanks! You are my “Flower Tale” now and forever!
    Knowledge is a Golden Circle that must be eternally forged. I know you will have a great role in continuing that education.
    My “Magic Pen” is a black Mont Blanc rollerball. I’ve had thousands of expensive pens –- fountain pens, regular pens, exotic writing instruments, etc. — over my lifetime, but the Mont Blanc rollerball writes the best blue ink I have ever experienced. It isn’t messy. It has a smooth motion. It makes me want to write more. It’s magical!
    😀

    Like

  35. The best gifts Nicola, are those you never thought about until you get them and the you wonder how you ever lived without!
    Did you give your children the same gift when they came of age?
    Heh. Tomorrow’s blog entry is short, probably a little odd, but it is on point and worthy of discussion is anyone’s about…
    😀
    Gravatar.com has nothing to do with our Avatars here. Our Avatars here are owned and operated by the WordPress.com servers. Yes, they load and then they don’t sometimes, but I think it’s been pretty good today. We’ve experienced much worse.
    I agree with you about our Katha!
    😉

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  36. The best gifts Nicola, are those you never thought about until you get them and the you wonder how you ever lived without!
    Did you give your children the same gift when they came of age?
    Heh. Tomorrow’s blog entry is short, probably a little odd, but it is on point and worthy of discussion is anyone’s about…
    😀
    Gravatar.com has nothing to do with our Avatars here. Our Avatars here are owned and operated by the WordPress.com servers. Yes, they load and then they don’t sometimes, but I think it’s been pretty good today. We’ve experienced much worse.
    I agree with you about our Katha!
    😉

    Like

  37. When it was their turn – the costs were prohibitive.
    The eldest got £500 plus £200 kit to go to Africa – Malawi, Kenya and Zanzibar – in fact she got hers six months early so she could go.
    My son got driving lessons and his driving test paid for.
    My youngest got her first years University tuition fees paid for her.
    No wonder I am short of an arm and a leg!

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  38. When it was their turn – the costs were prohibitive.
    The eldest got £500 plus £200 kit to go to Africa – Malawi, Kenya and Zanzibar – in fact she got hers six months early so she could go.
    My son got driving lessons and his driving test paid for.
    My youngest got her first years University tuition fees paid for her.
    No wonder I am short of an arm and a leg!

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  39. Nicola! Thank you!
    David! Wow!!! You are the first person I met (virtually though!) who is a proud owner of a Mont Blanc! Who actually knows and appreciates its magic!!! Yay!!!
    You can see my avatar? Ha! I can’t!!! Double ha!!!
    I do have a grandson! 😀
    Actually he is one of my very good friends who is three/four years younger to me…very intelligent, affectionate, warm, friendly – the safe and best bet in such case is adopting – I did exactly that! 😀

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  40. Nicola! Thank you!
    David! Wow!!! You are the first person I met (virtually though!) who is a proud owner of a Mont Blanc! Who actually knows and appreciates its magic!!! Yay!!!
    You can see my avatar? Ha! I can’t!!! Double ha!!!
    I do have a grandson! 😀
    Actually he is one of my very good friends who is three/four years younger to me…very intelligent, affectionate, warm, friendly – the safe and best bet in such case is adopting – I did exactly that! 😀

    Like

  41. It’s so great you matched the right gift with the right child, Nicola. Wonderful!
    Do you have your original lifetime membership card or do they send you a new one every year?
    Preserve the house at all costs! Don’t knock down a wall and add an addition for your giant new HDTV!
    :mrgreen:

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  42. It’s so great you matched the right gift with the right child, Nicola. Wonderful!
    Do you have your original lifetime membership card or do they send you a new one every year?
    Preserve the house at all costs! Don’t knock down a wall and add an addition for your giant new HDTV!
    :mrgreen:

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  43. Hi Katha!
    I have had MANY Mont Blanc pens. They are all quite wonderful. I have a nice Parker collection as well.
    Yes, I’ve been able to see your Avatar all day. Sounds like you need to clear your browser cache. SHIFT+CLICK on the refresh/reload button and force a new page to load.
    I am still confused by your grandson! He’s four years younger than you and you adopted him? Or the person 4 years younger than you has a son that you adopted?

    Like

  44. Hi Katha!
    I have had MANY Mont Blanc pens. They are all quite wonderful. I have a nice Parker collection as well.
    Yes, I’ve been able to see your Avatar all day. Sounds like you need to clear your browser cache. SHIFT+CLICK on the refresh/reload button and force a new page to load.
    I am still confused by your grandson! He’s four years younger than you and you adopted him? Or the person 4 years younger than you has a son that you adopted?

    Like

  45. Wow! Many!!! I have a funny story to share – 😀
    I was in 2nd/3rd year of college when my grand pa brought a proposal for an arranged marriage for me – the groom’s family saw me in a family wedding and liked me. I had one small condition – I wanted a court marriage only (a complete no no; there has to be a social function following all traditional customs) and wanted to have an original Mont Blanc (almost impossible to get in India at that point of time) to sign…it goes without saying that didn’t work out! 😀
    I do understand your confusion; the concept itself is foreign to you. Yes, my grandson is only four years younger than me. I didn’t officially adopt him – I address him as my grandson and I mean it. Fun and safe…at the same time! I do have a brother like that too!

    Like

  46. Wow! Many!!! I have a funny story to share – 😀
    I was in 2nd/3rd year of college when my grand pa brought a proposal for an arranged marriage for me – the groom’s family saw me in a family wedding and liked me. I had one small condition – I wanted a court marriage only (a complete no no; there has to be a social function following all traditional customs) and wanted to have an original Mont Blanc (almost impossible to get in India at that point of time) to sign…it goes without saying that didn’t work out! 😀
    I do understand your confusion; the concept itself is foreign to you. Yes, my grandson is only four years younger than me. I didn’t officially adopt him – I address him as my grandson and I mean it. Fun and safe…at the same time! I do have a brother like that too!

    Like

  47. Hi David & Nicola,
    The good thing about the HDTV flat panels is that they take up less space than the old fashion tube sets. I’m thinking it would be nice to get a smaller flat panel to mount on the wall in my bedroom. Smaller flat panels are very reasonably priced about now.
    Of course, you could splurge and get a $70,000 USD flat panel. 🙂
    Katha,
    I have to second David’s comments. The picture looks nice!
    I’m confused about the grandson also, but I’ll probably have to re-read the comments to figure it out. 🙂

    Like

  48. Hi David & Nicola,
    The good thing about the HDTV flat panels is that they take up less space than the old fashion tube sets. I’m thinking it would be nice to get a smaller flat panel to mount on the wall in my bedroom. Smaller flat panels are very reasonably priced about now.
    Of course, you could splurge and get a $70,000 USD flat panel. 🙂
    Katha,
    I have to second David’s comments. The picture looks nice!
    I’m confused about the grandson also, but I’ll probably have to re-read the comments to figure it out. 🙂

    Like

  49. Chris!
    We gotta get a few HDTV flat panels. We only have “regular” TVs here and they’re getting old and fussy.
    You should give Nicola some buying advice on what brand to buy! She’s looking for a nice flat panel.
    I’d like three of those 103 inchers! Wow! You know in two years they’ll cost $2,000 USD and the 200 inchers will be $70 grand!
    😀
    Re-reading the comments will not help you understand the grandson thing. I’ve already done that three times!
    😆

    Like

  50. Chris!
    We gotta get a few HDTV flat panels. We only have “regular” TVs here and they’re getting old and fussy.
    You should give Nicola some buying advice on what brand to buy! She’s looking for a nice flat panel.
    I’d like three of those 103 inchers! Wow! You know in two years they’ll cost $2,000 USD and the 200 inchers will be $70 grand!
    😀
    Re-reading the comments will not help you understand the grandson thing. I’ve already done that three times!
    😆

    Like

  51. You are welcome David!
    I had to find some innovative ways to get rid of those unwanted proposals… how long can you fight being a girl of 18/19 years old? That too in India? 😀
    You are still confused? Why? About my four years younger grandson??? Now I am confused….

    Like

  52. You are welcome David!
    I had to find some innovative ways to get rid of those unwanted proposals… how long can you fight being a girl of 18/19 years old? That too in India? 😀
    You are still confused? Why? About my four years younger grandson??? Now I am confused….

    Like

  53. Hi Katha!
    I like your expertise at getting out of those sticky situations where others claiming to know you more than you try to marry you off to write off your dreams!
    I am confused because a grandson is the son of one’s son or daughter. Do you have a son or daughter we don’t know about that then gave birth to your grandson?
    I have a hard time imagining you as a grandmother — adopted or not –- especially when you so specifically honor your lineage and the efforts and accomplishments of your great-grandfather!
    Do you mean godson instead of grandson?

    Like

  54. Hi Katha!
    I like your expertise at getting out of those sticky situations where others claiming to know you more than you try to marry you off to write off your dreams!
    I am confused because a grandson is the son of one’s son or daughter. Do you have a son or daughter we don’t know about that then gave birth to your grandson?
    I have a hard time imagining you as a grandmother — adopted or not –- especially when you so specifically honor your lineage and the efforts and accomplishments of your great-grandfather!
    Do you mean godson instead of grandson?

    Like

  55. David,
    Your family members will be too obsessed about doing best for you if you are born in India – “Father knows best!”
    I have seen one of friend’s mother to go for hunger strike because my friend didn’t want to study computer engineering!
    I do agree, theoretically you need a son or a daughter (which I don’t have) to have a grandson. What if I pay the same affection to someone as my grandson, treat him as my own?
    I do honor my lineage but at the same time blood relationship is not everything to me. Who knows what will I pass on to my virtual grandson? If nothing, at least the “quest for knowledge!”
    I believe in the following:
    “The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other’s life”- Richard Bach
    Why do I do this? Another innovative way… 😀

    Like

  56. David,
    Your family members will be too obsessed about doing best for you if you are born in India – “Father knows best!”
    I have seen one of friend’s mother to go for hunger strike because my friend didn’t want to study computer engineering!
    I do agree, theoretically you need a son or a daughter (which I don’t have) to have a grandson. What if I pay the same affection to someone as my grandson, treat him as my own?
    I do honor my lineage but at the same time blood relationship is not everything to me. Who knows what will I pass on to my virtual grandson? If nothing, at least the “quest for knowledge!”
    I believe in the following:
    “The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other’s life”- Richard Bach
    Why do I do this? Another innovative way… 😀

    Like

  57. I guess it’s your manipulation of the family hierarchy that is confusing us, Katha. Sure, you can make whatever connections you like, but to use such a specific word as “grandson” for a person four years younger than use is confusing to people who are trying to understand and communicate with you on a common level of shared understanding.

    Like

  58. I guess it’s your manipulation of the family hierarchy that is confusing us, Katha. Sure, you can make whatever connections you like, but to use such a specific word as “grandson” for a person four years younger than use is confusing to people who are trying to understand and communicate with you on a common level of shared understanding.

    Like

  59. Thank you for the update David!
    No matter what I call someone – grandson or great great grandson – I am the same, and will be!
    There will be no change in that common level of shared understanding!

    Like

  60. Thank you for the update David!
    No matter what I call someone – grandson or great great grandson – I am the same, and will be!
    There will be no change in that common level of shared understanding!

    Like

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