Felons, Fascists, Freeloaders and Fools: Not My Utopia!

Utopia is a new, $50 million, reality television series from Fox that is supposed to run for a year — but I don’t think the show will make it to the end of October because of horrible casting decisions and even more miserable ratings.  The producers get some things right and most everything else wrong.

The technical aspects of the show, the live feed, the landscape, and the idea, are all right — but the casting is completely and horrifyingly wrong — as is the creepy-pervy peeping-tom-ish host who ruins the television show with his “stalkeristic” vibe and prissy mustache and bizarro hat and glasses.

As well, when you choose a convicted felon to be the center of your show from the git-go, and he’s also the initial online presence for your show and live feeds portal, something terrible and awful has gone wrong on a deep DNA level that cannot be cured by God, a false baptism, or human infusion.

Continue reading → Felons, Fascists, Freeloaders and Fools: Not My Utopia!

Are We Done with the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, Yet?

Yesterday, I posted what I thought was an innocuous Twitter update asking if we’ve gone too far with the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge because now it is more about famous people getting wet than actually raising ongoing, substantial, awareness for the disease.  Sure, we remember people doing stupid things for a video camera, but aren’t there more dangerous things going on in the world that more demand our rapt attention like, say Ferguson, Missouri and beheading Americans?

Continue reading → Are We Done with the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, Yet?

…and We Still Ended Up Feeding the Fox!

Most of rural Portuguese households rely on buckets.  Buckets for wood, water, pine cones, clothes pegs/pins – you name it there will be a bucket for it.  We all use similar types of black buckets — ownership is usually interchangeable along with the contents. Occasionally, we  halfheartedly say we will color code them with tape on the handles according to ownership — it lasts about a month before our buckets are everywhere again.

However, we have a special bucket — bright orange with a lid.  This is for our kitchen waste.  We do not compost our food waste here for several reasons.  First, the smell, and the flies amplified by the heat and, second, composting encourages rats, mice and other vermin such as foxes.  We feel most of our food waste to the chickens and they give us eggs in return.

Continue reading → …and We Still Ended Up Feeding the Fox!

How Bristol Palin Ruined Dancing with the Stars and Why Nicki Minaj Tanked American Idol

Reality Television bores me now, but what really angers me is when television shows pretend to be honest contests when they’re really all a pre-determined setup from the get-go, just as we have indelibly learned this week with Bristol Palin’s horrible — but she’s staying! — routine on Dancing with the Stars; as well as Nicki Minaj’s fake meltdown with Mariah Carey on American Idol… which hasn’t even officially aired yet!

Websites like Vote for the Worst tend to take credit for contestants like Bristol Palin beating the odds and staying when it is really all about contractual agreements set in stone before the first dance begins:

They said it was impossible… She’s by far the worst dancer; She’s has the personality of a rock; She’s as likeable as the plague. But it doesn’t matter as VFTW and The Tea Party have done it once again as not only was Bristol safe, she wasn’t even in jeopardy! Meanwhile, VFTW and Bristol knocked off Joey Fatone, who even as the worst dancer in N’Sync can dance circles around Bristol.

Continue reading → How Bristol Palin Ruined Dancing with the Stars and Why Nicki Minaj Tanked American Idol

Cheryl Cole was Simon Cowell's Waterloo

I’ve suffered through the debut week of the X Factor and I can confidently say the show is a dud.  We’ve seen it all before.  The show is formulaic and treacly and I now understand why Cheryl Cole was fired.

Continue reading → Cheryl Cole was Simon Cowell's Waterloo

Seth MacFarlane Ruins the Flintstones

Sad news fell this week that “Family Guy” creator Seth MacFarlane was about to take his potty-mouth humor and emboss it into a reincarnation of the classic cartoon series, “The Flintstones.”

Continue reading → Seth MacFarlane Ruins the Flintstones

Banksy Beats Down the Simpsons

We love Banksy.  He’s an Enigma Artist.  This week, he took on — The Simpsons — to make a political point that the television cartoon is a profiteering entity made rich on the backs of foreign, slave, labor.

Continue reading → Banksy Beats Down the Simpsons