Do you believe there are some people who are born cursed and who are doomed to a life of misery for reasons beyond their direct control?

Cursed

You’ve heard the commonly shared memes that, by default, label and curse while labeling and cursing: “A rain cloud follows her around.” “He was born under a dark star.” “She could never catch a break. “He’s unlucky in cards.”

How do you explain those common phrases in our vernacular? Are they made ordinary because they are true or are they used because we seek to give definition and expression to that which we cannot comprehend? Is it simpler to label someone “unlucky” than it is to plunge deeper into the reasons for their failure and help them out of a physical and emotional hole? How do you explain the cursed life of Kathleen Caronna?

Kathleen Caronna (born 1964) is an investment analyst and New York City resident who became well-known due to her involvement in two accidents that came to national attention in a nine-year span. On Thanksgiving Day, 1997, while attending the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade with her husband, Ignazio Massimo, and then-infant son, Caronna was seriously injured when high winds pushed the Cat in the Hat balloon into a lamppost. Debris from the accident fractured Caronna’s skull and left her in a coma for a month; she later sued the city for nearly $400 million and received an undisclosed settlement.[1]On October 11, 2006, a small plane carrying New York Yankees baseball pitcher Cory Lidle crashed into Caronna’s 41st-floor home in the Belaire Apartments on Manhattan’s Upper East Side. Although the plane’s engine landed in her bedroom, Caronna was unhurt, as she was not home at the time.[2] The high-profile nature of the accidents led to changes in guidelines governing the use of parade balloons in high winds [3] and the piloting of aircraft under visual flight rules along the East River general aviation corridor.

Is Kathleen Caronna unlucky? Is she a martyr? Is she s messenger?

Is she merely the victim of coincidence? When I was a student at UNL, there was a young woman my age who was known campus-wide as “The Black Widow” because any man’s life she touched in a significant and enduring way ended in his death or permanent paralysis. In high school she dated a football star who was hit hard into the sideline filled with cheerleaders. He was paralyzed for life with a broken neck.

She was one of the cheerleaders. As a Sophomore at UNL, one of the men she dated died in a car crash while she slept in the passenger seat. She was unharmed in the accident. During our Junior year at UNL she found me.

I admit I avoided her as much as possible and I never accepted her offers to “hang out” together only because of her Black Widow reputation. I later learned she was engaged to be married when her fiancée died in a car crash. He was killed head-on while she slept beside him in the passenger seat. She walked away without a scratch. How do we reconcile these eerie anomalies of living?

Do we earn our dark clouds or are they provided to us at birth? I’m sure you must have met one or two of these “cursed” people in your life. Do you avoid them or welcome them? Has their bad luck ever rubbed off on you? Is it possible for a cursed person to change someone’s luck?

50 Comments

  1. Interesting article David!
    Some people are just ‘born unlucky’ – coincidence can be a good word to describe them. Some people bring ‘bad luck’ to themselves, some bring it to others.
    Do they earn it?
    I think they are just a victim of the situation they are in. Or, some uncanny/ inexplicable force makes them aware of the dark side of life…
    Why? I am clueless.

  2. Hi Katha!
    I think some people are born under a dark cloud and they are never able to come out from under it.
    I also know many LUCKY people who can do no wrong and their lives always spin in their favor. It is magical to witness.
    I’m not sure how to help or think about the truly cursed. Do we pity them? Live in terror of them? Ignore them? Help them?

  3. ‘Pity’ is a feeling that helps none, nor the one who does it, neither the subject/ object.
    ‘Living in terror’ will be something like being influenced or biased without proper proof – being superstitious may be?
    ‘Ignore them’ – that’s easy…that’s the thing most people do.
    ‘Help them?’ – That’s a good choice but it’s hard; sometimes these people get sucked into their own misery, sometimes they are just lost, and sometimes they are not even aware of the situation…tricky!

  4. Hi David,
    I’m a believer positive thinking. If you visualize success, more often than not, things work out in your favor.
    I wonder if the opposite works in the cases of the unlucky people. Does pessimism become reality if enough of the bleak thoughts run through someones mind?

  5. Chris —
    How does your positive thinking reconcile “The Curse of Canaan?”
    The Black Widow I mention never saw herself that way. She was just an “ordinary girl” as she claimed in the face of the deaths — yet the facts of her life belie that very statement. Shouldn’t one in some way own up the obvious curse of their life in order to be freed from it?

  6. I agree with Katha. This is an interesting topic and when I think of cursed people I think back to the plagues in history. There are religious stories of plagues and other plagues that are menacing to the body politic. I think curses are real.

  7. Hi David,
    I had to read up on the “Curse of Canaan” since hadn’t thought about it much. I just thought it was the ravings of someone who drank too much, dropped trou, and had to be covered by his son. Maybe it goes to show that no good deed goes unpunished.
    I don’t know how so many people went off track with that bit of scripture.

  8. I think you’re giving short shrift to the curse, Chris, because it is quite fascinating how Ham was cursed via his son:

    The curse on Canaan is the most difficult to understand because, as we suggested in an earlier question, it is hard to see why he should be cursed rather than his father, who actually did the wrong. But we note the following. First, it is a biblical principle (whether liked by us or not) that the sins of the fathers are visited on the children even to the third and fourth generations (Exod. 20:5). Second, the punishment, though inflicted on Canaan, was appropriate to Ham since he reaped exactly as he had sown. He sinned as a son and was punished in his son. Third, the assigning of the punishment to Canaan may have been (as is so often the case in God’s judgments) a function of the mercy of God, who could have cursed Ham and all his descendants but instead restricted the punishment to only this fourth part, Canaan being only one of Ham’s four sons. Whatever the reasoning may be, the judgment is nevertheless pronounced: “Cursed be Canaan! The lowest of slaves will he be to his brothers” (v. 25).

    http://www.ldolphin.org/canaan.html
    This all goes to the idea of honor and punishment and how curses — and the cursed serve their retribution upon the innocent which goes against what Anne argued earlier that we are born cursed.
    The Curse of Canaan provides one example where a curse is unearned and placed on the innocent and the unsuspecting.

  9. Hi David!
    I understand yours rather Aristotle’s point.
    I would like to mention it as ‘helplessness’ from a viewer’s perspective instead of ‘pity’.
    ‘Terror’ – ? Well, the victim has a choice he/she can make – it takes extreme willpower. In fact it drains out a person.
    I empathize with the well known playwright Wendy Wasserstein, though. There are tragedies in life, sometimes the reasons can be analyzed, sometimes it is unknown.
    Wendy Wasserstein , being successful in every sense of the term couldn’t escape the social/ self imposed pressure of getting married or being a Mom. She, unfortunately had to pay the price.
    The whole incident reminds me a very prominent public figure/ actress back in India.
    Rekha,
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rekha
    is known as ‘seduction personified in an extremely dignified way’. She is, what we call a ‘love child’; her parents were never married.
    She first appeared in some movies in her teens where she looked fat, classless, uncouth. She almost emerged like a phoenix in a movie later, in which she looked absolutely stunning and her career escalated from there. She was married twice; her first husband died of heartattack, second one committed suicide. She was known to be engaged with an affair with another Indian movie ikon – you will recognise him – ‘the teacher’ in ‘Black’.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amitabh_Bachchan
    At the age of 50+, she is still gorgeous; probably the best looking and most gracefully dressed actress Indian cinema witnessed ever.
    She is successful, rich, exceptionally beautiful, poised and intelligent.
    She is still single. It is known, she is still waiting for the ‘right person’.
    Apparently there is no similarity between Wendy Wasserstein and Rekha; in other way – there is.

  10. Right on target, Katha! I love it when you share your insights like this! You make such wonderful connections!
    Wendy’s tragedy was in her own selfishness. Instead of wanting to be a mother to a child, she just wanted to have a baby. There’s a bit difference there and it is defined in Aristotle’s theory of Pity and Terror.
    I love your links. Thank you to the pointer to Rekha. She is awfully gorgeous and totally beautiful!

  11. It’s all superstition. Being unlucky is the same thing is being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or you could say that if someone is unlucky, they are just unprepared to face certain trials of life.
    Everybody has obstacles in life. Many times these are far out of the reach of your own control. What you can control however, is how you deal with these obstacles. For some it comes easy due to being very bright. Others are slower, and while they may seem unlucky, it could just be that their parents never taught them how to cope with life’s mysterious ways.
    Luck? Nah, it’s all in your head.

  12. Perhaps not, but I believe that people control their own destinies. I don’t see how someone else has the “magical” power to put a curse on someone.
    Now, I will believe that if someone holds this as a truth in their mind, that this curse may happen. In other words, the fear of being cursed can probably cause much damage.
    However, if you curse me, and I just blow it away, like it’s nothing, I won’t be bothered by it. I will forget all about it and go on with my life, without the curse having taken a bit of effect.
    So in essence, what I’m saying is that the curse can only take effect if the one who is cursed, actually believes in it. If you believe you are cursed, you doom yourself.
    It’s all about choices, and this is how I can see the similarity in curses and luck. Overcoming this fear of “dark clouds” involves self-reliance, self-preparedness, and self-confidence.
    These curses and bad luck only have power when they are believed to have power.
    If you are scared of this, I would suggest that you don’t break any mirrors or walk under any ladders.
    The only kind of luck/curses I ever believed in (for the sake of fun at least), involves baseball. It happens to be a sport with a lot of history of superstition. Interesting stuff to read about actually.

  13. Hi David,
    I’ve never been literal in my Biblical interpretations, so I’ve never put great weight on curses passing along for generations to generations.
    I’m more of a New Testament guy.
    Jesus paid the sacrifice for humanities’ original sin (or sinful nature), so that we could break free from the constraints of sin when we ask for forgiveness. Since my sins are forgiven, I am not held in bondage to my forgiven sin. Accordingly, if there were generational curses — and I interpret any such curse as being the consequences of sin — their power, i.e. sin’s power, was smashed when Jesus was crucified.
    That isn’t to say that if your parents were bad it won’t have some consequences for the children. Having a drunk exhibitionist father could create problems for the kids. If parents are bad today, the kids might end up being taken into foster care. A crack baby might have medical problems because of the sins of the mother.
    But, the kids aren’t held in bondage for eternity because of the sins of their father or mother. At any time, anyone can ask for forgiveness and instantly be forgiven.
    I’ve always thought of Cain’s curse as being the mark and weight that would forever be on his conscious for his crimes.

  14. Brent —
    Aren’t there more insidious, and verifiable, curses throughout history that go beyond the individual and infect society?
    I don’t think it matters if the cursed believe they are cursed — it’s the rest of the world who places the curse upon the body and then perpetuates the curse that most matters.
    I don’t think the Black Widow cared about her curse — but everyone else did and so she was stigmatized and confounded and ostracized because of it.

  15. Chris!
    If you don’t believe in the literal translation of the Bible, how do you handle Commandments like “Thou Shall Not Kill?” Is that just a suggestion and not a mandate?
    It seems you’re arguing if you murder someone all you need to do is ask to be forgiven and all is erased. If that’s what you’re saying, then where is the morality in that sort of living where all sins and misdeeds and murders are wiped away with simple request?
    Isn’t it just that sort of thinking that encourages abortion center bombings and terrorist strikes in the midst of a busy marketplace? “I will be forgiven my murderous deeds in the name of a higher power than common man.”
    For many years the Mormon Church believed they knew “the mark of Cain” meant Black people and that’s why Blacks were not allowed to become full members of the LDS church. Now that’s a curse that swings both ways and its awful effect cannot be denied and it was given to the Church by God.

  16. Societies that have been cursed, have been cursed by God or the Devil perhaps?
    Humans do not have this power, unless individuals who are cursed by someone believe in it. It’s all in the head in this case.
    If a whole civilization is cursed, this is done by God who is punishing the wicked.

  17. Hi Brent —
    Let’s say someone places a Voodoo curse on another person. That person not be aware and may not even care about the curse — but for those who believe in the curse, the “cursed” is cursed and in danger and dangerous and in peril and perilous and the rest of the community — rightly or wrongly, revolts against the cursed.
    During the Salem Witch Trials — those who were identified as “witches” were cursed by the local community leadership, right? The accused could recant or exchange their lives for a higher purpose against their curse.
    The public perception of a curse is a powerful tool of control, isn’t it?

  18. It can be, but curses only exist when people believe in them, otherwise they are merely words. Perhaps I wasn’t clear enough by what I meant. The witch trials were crap, and so is voodoo, at least in the context of curses. As a religious and ritualistic practice, there is a difference, but humans do not have the power to put a hex on someone, unless the Devil or demons are somehow involved with this “magic”.
    I believe that it is possible for magic to exist, but it is supernatural, and so without the power of the Devil or the god of the first two Heavens (a Biblical reference), and demonic evil, this is not possible.
    It is interesting stuff to read about, however I would shy away from getting too far or deep into this type of spiritual stuff, because you just might invite evil spirits and/or demons to come into your life. I’m not joking about this either. This is why Ouija boards can be extremely dangerous things to bring into your house and “play with”.
    I’m not in any way suggesting anything about you, just mentioning that evil is for real, and it’s a good idea for anyone to not get too involved with it.

  19. Hi David,
    If one sin stained us for the rest of our lives and there was no way to seek forgiveness, why did Jesus forgive the criminal on the cross on the day of his execution or stop the people from stoning the adulterous woman?
    I don’t think forgiveness can be used as a justification for sinning. You’d have to seek forgiveness for that sin as well. Part of the forgiveness process involves repentance — turning away from the old evil ways in favor of the new, loving ways.
    We have all sorts of interpretations of American law that change depending on the attorneys and judges involved. Even a Supreme Court justice or two can result in major changes in the way we interpret the Constitution. That doesn’t mean that our laws aren’t mandates, but just suggestions.
    As far as abortion clinic bombing and the like, it is a symptom of the nature of sin. The battle should be won through love. The people who turn to violence are Anti-Christs, just as the people from the Anti-Christian church who protest at military funerals because they’re filled with a Satanic rage against their fellow people.
    The Christian way to end abortion is the way that many organizations and churches are going about it now. Provide services for women in need who find themselves in situations where they might have to make choices based on their financial circumstances. This is also the way that some European countries are going a similar way of helping their fellow citizens: they provide benefits that remove financial burdens from the equation.
    Love is the solution to all of the world’s problems, ranging from all sorts of anti-human ways were treat each other from pollution, to abortion, to war, to killings in the urban core over silly things. Notice that most of these things happen because we stop loving and start thinking of others in terms of economic units or potentials.
    If we take things literally and fail to see the artistic and poetic side of many things, we will end up with Sharia law. It also accounts for many of the Satanic notions and interpretations of the Bible that led many away from God and straight into the heart of Hell.

  20. I agree with your warnings, Brent, but it’s fascinating how you can so closely pare away differences in belief systems. If you don’t believe in curses and the power of the supernatural, then a Ouija shouldn’t scare you in the least, right?
    I agree Voodoo and the Witch trials were crummy — but people still suffered and died because of those curses — phony or not.
    If enough people believe in something, great power is created by the shared mindset and that’s when we begin to slide down the slippery slope!

  21. Anna Nicole Smith is Dead:

    Anna Nicole Smith has died, this according to her attorney Ron Rail. She was 39.
    Desperate attempts to save her life were made by paramedics en route to Memorial Regional Hospital. Smith did not survive, despite receiving CPR and emergency intubation to facilitate her breathing. …
    Anna had been hospitalized for a week last November with pneumonia. Daughter Dannielynn, subject of an ongoing DNA test battle, was born on September 7. Her son Daniel died of a drug overdose on September 10. People magazine is reporting that Dannielynn is in the Bahamas.

    http://www.tmz.com/2007/02/08/anna-nicole-smith-collapses/
    A cursed life or not?

  22. hello all,
    I was searching for keywords having to do with curses and bad luck when i came upon this discussion. I’d rather you didnt take anything written here as any kind of plea for help, because though pity is appreciated, it ultimately draws a distinction between those feeling it and whom they feel it for. If you’re, like I, on the sad side of the line its really only more evidence that you’re alone in your cursed life. My life is cursed, or whatever. Im very intuitive and sensitive to my surroundings, as well as very intelligent and prodigious in a variety of interests. Im extremely analytical and have spent my entire young life since preadolescence trying to understand myself and what is taking place in my life. I used to think it took different forms; as a teen i thought inevitably something bad would succeed anything good that happened to me. I’ve overhauled myself inward and outward many times over, changing habits, personality traits, anything i found negative or to have negative effects.
    now i know that whenever im happy or positively motivated to change myself or life for the better, and more importantly, in a position to make good on my efforts, something very negative and out of my control happens to nullify any progression towards solace or betterment. Thats the form it takes and it takes others as well, but then end product time and time again has been unimaginable humiliation and suffering. im young and have been extremely positive every time. theres nothing i can do to stop it. when i surrender to it nothing seems to happen. I dont know maybe thats enough. But when i fight and try and move on, or worse forget, it crushes me. I cant describe to you the maybe 20 – 30 examples of it in my life. but its been less than 25 years and its getting worse. This is true and not something i take lightly but something i dont tell anyone. They wouldnt believe me anyway. I’ve always been extremely rational and pragmatic and i really have no answers. Ive been to maybe 4 good therapists (analysts) for the depression, stress, and anxiety this has caused me and they all not only agree with just about everything i tell them about myself, including this, they have no answers either. I’m not vain but i want to stress my intellect and sovereign objective thinking solely to underscore the lack of subjective or negative interference. I know its bleak, trust me, but its true and im wondering what you might think about my case. I dont believe you’ll think much i havent, but i still search for anwers, and moreso just wanted to tell my story to some random people to see they’re reaction to it. dave

  23. Hi Dave,
    I couldn’t have said it better myself. I’m going thru the same thing and applied the same techniques for the betterment of my situation. I’m a devout Christian and try to find answers thru my religion – reading the scriptures and prayers but I haven’t found any answer yet. I read and I’m reading Eckhart Tolle’s “New Earth – Awakening to your Life’s Purpose” and similar books – but nothing changed my situation.
    Growing up I’ve always heard my mom say “this family must be cursed” and I never understood what she was talking about as we had good life. Now I do. Every time I try to do something, there is something beyond my control that blocks it – it was the same for my mom and it still is. Friends that I give my two cents worth of ideas to succeed using it but when I try to apply the same thing the result is always negative for me. I’ll turn 43 this year and have lost hope. As a Christian hope is one thing I shouldn’t lose but when everything I do/try turns into something negative, I don’t know what to hope for.

    1. I agree with what you say. I will be 40 soon. Things have never worked out in my life no matter how hard i try. It’s like what you said, something’s blocking it when each time i thought things are working out.

      Only people who have gone thru these will understand. It has nothing to do with intelligence or how we deal with the situations like someone commented.

      I’m also a christian. anyway, have you found any solution or does anyone have any advice?

    2. When I read your comment, it looked like someone had written about me and my family. Back home in India, people have belief in curses. Even as a teenager, a neighbour who dabbled in astrology, looked at my horoscope chart and told me about the things that would befall. I hardy paid heed to what he said. Over the next 20 years, we saw things happen that make us believe in what he told us. Several astrologers we consulted told us the same that we have the curse of a woman. We cousins are the last generation. While most are unmarried, the ones that are married have no children. So, the curse will end with us, fortunately.

      It is true, that only people who have lived through this can understand its seriousness.

  24. Your comment is so sad. I hope you will be able to somehow defeat this “curse thing” you feel. I had one friend who wasn’t very lucky and who didn’t attend church, but would always say in the direst of times, “In the name of Jesus Christ, Satan get out of my life!”
    The only problem with that mantra is that he sort of yelled it and once he started yelling it, he wouldn’t stop for 15 minutes, and any time any little thing went wrong, he’d start yelling. Some days you had a neverending stream…

  25. I have had a very unlucky life, although the last 20 years have been a great improvment. I had all sorts of difficulties in relationships, I always seemed to bring out the worst character traits in anyone that I met, or perhaps I just had an unfortunate knack of attracting nasty people to me. I`ve developed a distinct mistrust of all humanity, & I think that`s what`s kept me safe over the last 20 years.

  26. Found this very interesting and particularly the comments. I believe in generational curses. I’ve had too many experiences and seen too much not to believe. I was under a curse and became suicidal. When dealing with my own situation, I found a book that helped me address the problem. Within 6 months of getting release from a generational curse my whole life turned around and it was astounding.

    I think things we say, things we do, and the things others say about us have the potential to place us under curses. However, they can be removed and prevented and it doesn’t take magic spells or special gadgets to do so.

    The book was called Blessings and Curses: You can choose. It was by a man called Derek Prince. And what he suggest works.

  27. Things were at a point I was planning suicide and I knew that wasn’t me. One day I just looked into a mirror and said, “God, it feels like I’m cursed of something and I don’t even believe in curses or that Christians can be cursed!” I ask for help.

    A week later I was shopping for a birthday present in a bookstore and I passed by a rack and as I passed I looked and saw the title. I picked it up, read the back and though it look interesting. I put it back. It was to expensive. Both my husband and I had lost jobs and I only had money for my son’s present. I left, got to the end of the aisle and went back. Picked it up again and read a couple of pages. I put it back again because of the price. I reached the end of the aisle and turned aruond, grabbed the book and rushed to the register. I paid for it and left, without the present, and read it in two days.

    I spent that two days crying because it felt as if someone had read my mail. He outlines 7 signs that a person is under a curse. I met 6 of them. I simply followed his instructions. In six months we both had jobs and I was no longer suicidal. I felt great, in fact. I still have that job, 14 years later.

  28. I don’t’ think it was affecting him except in that a wife’s situation always affects the family. We couldn’t find work. I was having health problems that didn’t make sense. I was going to the doctor and he was just saying, “Get more sleep. Get more exercise.” I kept telling him I wanted to sleep forever and he just ignored me. I wasn’t joking. I think that was when I began planning how to hurt myself without hurting my family. Of course that isn’t possible. So, he suffered with me because of my problem. I believe afterward that he had one also but he never would read the book. He just didn’t read things.

    Anyway, I think the cause was probably a variety of sources. Based on what I’ve read, curses can arise as a result of our actions or our words. Despite what people believe words have tremendous power. If they didn’t there would be no such thing as verbal abuse. Children can be destroyed by words. We all believe in words. They have the power to convince nations to commit genocide. Saying they don’t matter is a lie.

    So, I suspect, I’ve said things in the past that set me up for it. And the actions of people associated with me could have played a part. My mother did not want me. I had a great great grandfather who was murdered. I can only guess. The source, to me is not important, unless it is something I did.

    What has happened is I became much more careful in my speech about people. I did not “wish” things on others. I still catch myself when I’m tempted wish harm on someone, even if it is just the heat of the moment.

    If I had not lived this experience, I would have said that this whole thing was ludicrous. I am a Christian and I absolutely did not believe in I could be under a curse. My words were uttered out of desperation as was my cry for help. The solution was totally unexpected. Folks can make of it what they will. I know.

  29. I honestly think you are born with a dark cloud. Some possible correlation to the fact of being wanted or not at birth….mistake or purposeful birth. My sister and I are identical twins and have struggled horribly all of our life to the point of things happening that are rediculous and we discuss this very fact all the time.

  30. Cursed? Unlucky? I don’t know what to call it but it definitely exists. I really don’t believe it’s about positive/negative thinking, intelligence or a refusal to make lemonade when life gives you lemons.

    Here’s (hopefully a brief) overview of my ‘cursed’/’unlucky’ life. I’m 41 now, I guess halfway through (?).

    I was sick as a child with bronchial problems that finally cleared up after 2 operations by age 4. I spent that 4 years in and out of hospital. My parents separated just after I got better.

    I was abused by my stepfather at age 4-15. I developed asthma after having measles at age 4 1/2. I did not grow out of asthma; it continues to this day.

    My father committed suicide when I was 12 and my fantasies of him rescuing me from my stepfather died with him.

    Moved country at 14, abuse continued. No family or friends.

    Ran away from home. Police took me back. Repeat times a lot until a social worker intervened and was made a ‘Ward of the State’. PS. This was not my first disclosure. It was the first time I was believed.

    Found out I had Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (direct result of abuse).

    Was raped in final year of school. Pregnant. Abortion. (Please don’t judge unless you’ve experienced it yourself)

    Went to full-time dance school. Period problems. Had it for 6 months continuously. Operation.

    Returned to dance school. One day, in the last month of my 3 year degree, a classmate was tired and asked if I would buy him a coffee from the vending machine. I only had my bus money but I bought it for him anyway. I walked home about 40 minutes). Got hit by a drunk driver who didn’t even have a licence.

    Spent the next 3 years learning how to walk again. Finally began retraining as a choreographer. My dance career was dead. Got my degree and began having issues with a previous surgery from the accident. It required a third surgery to fix it and another year of physio.

    Retrained a third time. Finally got work as a choreographer and dance teacher.

    Started getting pelvic/period problems again. It was uterine fibroid. 2 surgeries and a year and half later, after dealing with the tumour growing to the size of a 5 month fetus and pressing on my left kidney, it was over.

    I flew to my birth country for an interview/audition. Got the job. Spent 4 years paying off medical debt.

    Was in a flood; natural disaster. Stayed for the cleanup amd then moved south to another small city. Had trouble finding work. Got hit by a tornado.

    Moved to a much larger city
    Resumed work. A junkie burned down the apartment block I was living in. I was then ripped off by the owner. I was s months rent in advance, plus bond amd I lost it. I must add here, the junkie was the girlfriend of apartment 1. I lived in apartment 6. Nothing to do with them.

    I was in the building at the time. The fire alarm failed to go off, the sprinklers failed also. I smelled burning and tried to find out where it was coming from. I went back to my apartment and there was fire spreading across the shared balcony. I ran and knocked on neighbours doors, then got the fire extinguisher while a neighbour called emergency services. I couldn’t put it out but I could prevent its spreading so fast. I then helped an injured neighbour out and down the stairs. The flames were licking up the walls and overhead by the time we reached yhe smoke stop doors.

    I was homeless, with nothing. My clothes and hair reaking of smoke. There was NO help. I went to an employer who bought me a bra, underwear, soap, shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste etc I slept on her couch for a few nights, then a friends couch for a few weeks.

    I finally flew back to the country I’d lived in prior. That final event brought on traumatic stress (ptsd). I kept having flashbacks and waking with my heart racing. Through thus I worked at a dvd store and cleaning peoples homes. I’ve been seeing a councellor for just over a year and felt like I was able to move forwarded again.

    Thismorning I got the results of a sonogram. I have uterine fibroids again.

    I didn’t do this to myself. I didn’t commit cardinal thought crimes. I’m not unintelligent. I’m not too lazy to try and make the best of things. I have put in incredible efforts to make a decent life for myself. I didn’t ask for this and I don’t deserve it.

  31. I am one of the unlucky, cursed or whatever term you would have. I was born on January, 4th. Every time a loved one passes or a tragedy occurs it’s on that very day. Ian 43 so I have long since stopped recognizing this day as anything good.