Meet Britney.  She’s a Mean Girl.  This Mean Girl currently lives in the Big Brother 12 house.  She’s crying because the house doesn’t like her Mean Girl ways and the other houseguests nominated her for eviction along with her best friend, Monet, The Only Other Mean Girl on the show.

The others don’t like Britney and Monet because they are cruel and catty.  They make fun of you behind your back.

They mock fellow houseguest Andrew’s Jewish religion.  They comment on the fake boobs on the Cute Girls.

Britney and Monet are 100% snark every day, all day, forever and ever.

Yet Britney doesn’t understand why the house hates her.

She has lived a pretty — and petty — and privileged life outside the Big Brother House.  She had good skin and fine hair and a personality that rots her out from the inside and perfumes her being with the stink of death throughout the day.

Britney thinks she’s all positivity and sunshine.  She can’t smell her own stank.

Meet Monet.  She’s crying because she’s still a Mean Girl too and, unlike Britney, she’s still on the nomination block for eviction.

Britney was able to snake her way off the block by winning The Power of Veto.  The house will have to deal with Only One Mean Girl now because Monet is not staying.

Monet is set for eviction on Thursday night during the live television show, and — like Britney next to her — she has no clue why nobody likes her.

Monet doesn’t clean up after herself in the bathroom.  She doesn’t wash dishes.  She doesn’t interact with anyone “below” her in terms of social status.

Monet is a model.  Monet is a Mean Girl.  The Mean Girl is crying because she feels sorry for herself and the end of her television fame — not for the things she’s done in the house.

The delicious Panopticonic wonder of Big Brother is watching the revelation of both the public and private façade.

Those of us who live constructive and cogent lives often wonder what makes Mean Girls so horribly cruel — and Big Brother provides some clues.  Mean Girls have low self-esteem.  Mean Girls live in bubbles.  Mean Girls attach themselves to other Mean Girls.  By putting down others, Mean Girls believe they are lifting their own buoy, but they are really only scraping the bottom of their own demise.

The sad part of the Mean Girl psyche is that they are totally oblivious to anything beyond the shell they have created for the cracking around them.

Mean Girls are clueless.  They have no human qualities you would want to share or imitate — and yet they survive really well in the real world because there are others around them with even lower self-esteem who feel redeemed in the shadow of the Mean Girl:  Sycophant, meet Sadist.

The real reason Britney is crying and so inconsolable isn’t because she finally understands what a terrible person she has always been — but rather because she’s finally realizing that when Monet leaves the house, she won’t have another Mean Girl around to share the snark.

Britney will be all alone; an island unto her vicious self — with no way to express how little she thinks of the others — because nobody other than another Mean Girl cares one whit about what she thinks.


  1. Give them 20 years. They will have lost their looks and will be divorced with children. It always catches up with the meanies. Even if they don’t know it.

  2. Here I was thinking that mean girls grew up from high school and matured. How naive of me! I suppose it’s good that one of the show’s mean girls is going because it means the other one will have further to fall.

    1. Oh, how I wished they matured, Gordon! When they hit the wall — and we all hit the wall — they take it so much harder than the rest of us because they have relied so heavily on their looks to manipulate and get ahead. With the loss of their perceived beauty, they become even angrier and more vengeful.

      Right! One Mean Girl alone has a hard time surviving because they have no receptive audience for their cruelty and so it all gets folded inward.

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